Author: John

CELEBITCHY – Sansa Stark has a message for everyone not committed to social distancing and / or straight-up quarantine right now. (Paraphrased, it’s “Stay the f*ck home, idiots.”) But Sophie Turner’s PSA is really directed at celebrities like Vanessa Hudgens and Evangeline Lilly who don’t understand why this is so important and who then talk about it out loud, helping inspire further idiocy

DLISTED – There’s an entire Twitter thread devoted to people sharing anecdotes about how mean Ellen DeGeneres is in real life, specifically so the dude who originated the thread will donate more and more money to charity. I think this is great, and not just for my profession — there have to be *tons* more A-list celebs who cultivate an air of public benevolence, but who are absolute shits to the “little people” around them. And we need more tea on those celebrities

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP – Condolences to Little Women: LA star Christy McGinity, whose baby daughter Violet died yesterday at just 17 days old. Violet was born seven weeks premature; Christy and her boyfriend Gonzo Carazo spent every day by Violet’s side in the NICU

VOX – We could also have avoided a lot of trouble over the last few years if the networks had never given airtime to any of Donald Trump’s daily thoughts on anything at all, let alone a still-worsening viral pandemic. But I kind of doubt they’re going to all of a sudden stop now

THE BLEMISH – If you haven’t seen this video of a naked, bathtub-bound Madonna burying and praising COVID-19 in about equal measure, you need to do yourself a favor and click straightaway

JEZEBEL – The “perfect playroom” is total aspirational bullshit, but that doesn’t stop hopeful parents (*raises hand* from organizing and reorganizing and cleaning it in hopes of preserving, for at least a moment, the elusive Platonic ideal

THE BLAST – “Meryl Streep’s Daughter Grace Gummer Files For Divorce, Mr. Robot Star Was Secretly Married!”

REALITY TEA – “NeNe Leakes Argues With Kandi Burruss For Shading Her In Confessionals On Real Housewives Of Atlanta”

LAINEY GOSSIP – “Exactly a week after one of the most cryptic album announcements, Donald Glover officially released his highly anticipated fourth studio album called 03.15.20. Before we get into the album itself, let’s talk about its release because it is so interesting and SO strange”

GO FUG YOURSELF – Enjoy the relative stability and comfort of known routines, like the 2020 Fug Madness tournament still going on despite its athletic counterpart having been canceled weeks (months? years? feels like at least years) ago

Former LHHATL cast member and longtime fan favorite Jessica Dime still gets asked on the regular why she quit the show. And it sounds like the Dimepiece finally had enough of the question, because she gave an unexpected and frankly shocking answer. According to Dime herself, one of the main reasons was the show’s producers pressuring her to have a threesome — not on camera, but with the producer him (or her) self. Read on for the details…

DLISTED – Harvey Weinstein keeps finding new and terrible ways to get himself in headlines. Mere weeks after the convicted rapist was hospitalized with chest pains following his sentencing on rape charges, we discover that Harvey Weinstein has coronavirus and is in isolation at a prison facility in upstate New York

VOX – In more big name coronavirus news, noted neighbor-haver and US Senator Rand Paul has contracted the disease. Paul apparently exposed enough of his colleagues to the virus that Republicans won’t have a Senate majority for at least a couple of weeks

THE BLAST – And in *good* coronavirus news, Tom Hanks and his wife Rita Wilson have passed their two week quarantine with no further symptoms. It’s not “vaccine available for everyone”-level good news, but I think at this point we’ll take Tom Hanks’ safe recovery with a smile and a Skyped-in high-five

CELEBITCHY – Kristen Stewart may have broken California’s shelter-in-place order with her quarantine relief hike, but then getting outside is a requirement for human sanity. And if anyone serious calls her on it, she can always point the finger at the photographer who snapped these shots of her in the first place

REALITY TEA – “Bethenny Frankel Says Coronovirus Relief Brought Her Closer To Boyfriend Paul Bernon”

JEZEBEL – If you don’t mind having your heart absolutely broken, here’s one story of how coronavirus-based restaurant closures are driving even more low- and middle-income earners out of the Bay Area, which in turn makes the place even less of a cultural and spiritual beacon than it had already become

THE BLEMISH – Speaking of food, here’s a handy guide to the best instructional cooking channels YouTube has to offer. Because, honestly, “you probably can’t cook as well as you think you can. I’m sure you can make a few dishes, but can you really cook?”

LAINEY GOSSIP – Lana Del Rey is single again, was spotted with “a friend” in LA just before the California lockdown commenced, and will maybe get together with Brad Pitt?

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP – “Randall Emmett Confirms His Wedding to Vanderpump Rules Star Lala Kent Has Been Postponed Due to Pandemic: How They’re Dealing”

GO FUG YOURSELF – Finally, enjoy this nostalgic trip back to the faraway land of 2002 with this glamorous throwback photo gallery of King Willem-Alexander’s marriage to Queen Maxima

A little over a year after falling victim to a viral hoax about her passing, My 600 Lb Life star Charity Pierce has revealed some shocking news about her health. In the 44-year-old’s own words, the Charity Pierce death scare was a cancer diagnosis — doubly frightening for Charity as cancer also took her mother’s life. Read on for the details from Charity herself.

We’ve gotten the first legal response to the first Megalomedia lawsuit accusing the My 600 Lb Life producers of “gross negligence” in the death of fan favorite LB Bonner. Megalomedia’s legal team countered the Bonner family’s lawsuit by categorically denying each of the family’s claims — and in turn accusing Bonner of neglecting his own health in the period leading to his 2018 suicide. Read on for the latest.

JEZEBEL – Republican businesswoman Kelly Loeffler, who also happens to be married to the chairman of the New York Stock Exchange, is one of several US senators to make millions of dollars selling stocks after a private briefing on COVID-19 literally months before the general public was warned about how serious the virus is. Loeffler’s coronavirus cash grab alone appears to have netted her around three million dollars

THE BLEMISH – There is apparently a version of Cats that features all the cats’ CGI buttholes. Those buttholes were later edited out of the version of Cats that made it to theaters. And we must all be out of shows and movies to binge, because now fans of ruby star cinema are demanding to see the “Butthole Cut” of Cats, a movie that, who knows, may actually be improved dramatically by the presence of cat buttholes a-plenty

CELEBITCHY – Academy Award-winner Octavia Spencer didn’t *present* this as advice in her recent interview on The Daily Show; given current circumstances, I’m choosing to take her words as advice and suggest them as advice for others

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP – “Blowups, Breakdowns, Bar Fights & Bear Smoochin’: MTV Releases ‘Total Madness’ Super Trailer for The Challenge Season 35″

THE BLAST – Speaking of binging entertainment, here’s another helpful list of stuff you maybe haven’t gotten to yet. This list was actually more helpful for me in straightening out a misconception I didn’t even realize I’d held: Lucifer, a show I have never seen one minute of, is not only not the Buffy spin-off Angel, it’s in no way related to Buffy at all

GO FUG YOURSELF – And in other, supremely important entertainment news, here’s a helpful explainer of how you can help websites — like GFY, yes, and also this very one you’re reading! — in our current era of despair

REALITY TEA – If Thomas Ravenel hadn’t already gotten the boot from Southern Charm over domestic violence allegations, he may well have been let go for spouting racist coronavirus conspiracy theories

DLISTED – A Tale of Two Celebrities: Lost star Daniel Dae Kim has tested positive for coronavirus and used social media to offer a calm, helpful, important little speech about the importance social distancing and quarantining. Meanwhile, Lost star Evangeline Lilly — whose father, suffering from stage four lukemia, is living with Lilly — called the pandemic a simple “flu” and said she’s conducting business as usual

VOX – Spain, like the United States, was slow to mobilize against coronavirus. However, unlike the US, Spain has been fast to enact and enforce countrywide quarantining over the past couple of weeks. Consider this both a cautionary tale about what to (maybe) expect in America and a tragedy about what might have been if we’d acted sooner

LAINEY GOSSIP – Finally, here’s a beautiful little bit of nostalgia for you to devour: “Romeo Must Die turns 20″

My 600 Lb Life and Where Are They Now? star Dottie Perkins is the sixth cast member to sue Megalomedia, the show’s production company. But Dottie’s lawsuit is arguably more shocking than the other five. While every suit claims reality TV fakery, Dottie’s is the first to claim that the producers outright lied about her weight loss progress, making it look like Dottie was gaining weight when she was actually losing. Dottie also accused producers of lying about covering her medical expenses — read on for all the details.

THE BLAST – Unlike SXSW 2020, Coachella postponed will give ticketholders the chance to attend the make-up dates in a few months. The California desert festival announced it’s pushing its April dates back to October due to coronavirus fears; South By Southwest is still getting roasted from all corners for refusing refunds after canceling this year for the same reason

REALITY TEA – RHOBH star emeritus Brandi Glanville still has some tea to spill on plenty of her fellow Bravo reality players, including Kenya Moore and Countess Luann

LAINEY GOSSIP – RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 12 contestant Sherry Pie has been booted from the show following revelations that Sherry catfished at least seven different actors by posing as a casting director on social media and promising big roles in exchange for “compromising and often sexual messages and audition tapes”

CELEBITCHY – The President of the United States is “definitely melting down” over coronavirus

VOX – On that note, should America be grateful that a couple of powerful billionaires are “stepping in on the coronavirus where the government has failed”?

JEZEBEL – “The Associated Press reports that Ashley Forbes, 32, and husband, Matthew Forbes, 35, allegedly made six different beer runs at two Targets in East Baton Rouge, ultimately stealing a total of $1000 in beer between February 24 and February 29. They were spotted on security cameras and ultimately arrested on Sunday, when Matthew Forbes was caught trying to stuff a drill in his pants in Walmart.”

DLISTED – “Kumail Najiani Says That Getting Buff Gave Him Body Dysmorphia”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP – “Little Women: LA Star Christy McGinity & Boyfriend Gonzo Carazo Welcome First Child Together; Baby Born Seven Weeks Premature”

GO FUG YOURSELF – And speaking of little women, here’s Greta Gerwig wearing a dress made out of either the best quilt or the busiest tablecloth of all time

THE BLEMISH – Just a week after undergoing surgery for an undisclosed heart problem, convicted rapist Harvey Weinstein fell down and hit his head while imprisoned and awaiting sentencing at Rikers Island. Apparently Harvey’s “head throbs all the time,” a likely consequence of decades of guilt and shame now catching up to him