Category: News

LINKS Andy Cohen coronavirus update, Prince Charles in danger, Love Is Blind new season…

REALITY TEAAndy Cohen hasn’t shared anything on social media since revealing his coronavirus diagnosis almost a week ago. So RHONY star Ramona Singer gave us the first Andy Cohen coronavirus update, as she says she’s been in close contact with Cohen via text the whole time; according to Ramona, Andy is “hanging in there” and doing much better than some of her other infected friends

CELEBITCHYPrince Charles, who announced his own coronaviral infection earlier this week, for some reason kept up a heavy traveling schedule, including going from London to Scotland to self-isolate. Charles is 71 years old and could have sheltered in one of Buckingham Palace’s 775 (literally) rooms instead of exposing however many more people to his germs before locking the door

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPNetflix should have known Love is Blind would be exactly the kind of trash TV people needed in 2020, global pandemic or no, because then they could have new seasons ready to go right now. Instead, fans of the show will have to be satisfied with the news that Netflix renewed LiB for two more seasons

VOXThis is likely to be very helpful, if also potentially quite depressing and discouraging: “Charting the coronavirus pandemic state by state: In cases, deaths, and tests per capita, here’s how each US state’s coronavirus situation compares”

GO FUG YOURSELFFug Madness 2020 is down to its Sweet Sixteen, and the best place for you to begin your voting is with whatever in the world Orange is the New Black and Russian Doll star Dasha Polanco is wearing, thinking, doing here

LAINEY GOSSIP“Cardi B’s rant about the inequality in the way coronavirus is currently being treated, and the dangers of celebrities creating a false sense of calm, is absolutely perfect,” and not just because it touches on the weird thing that happens when major celebrities talk about “celebrities” as if it’s a group they themselves don’t belong to

JEZEBELAnother Netflix shout-out: “Thank God for Tiger King

DLISTEDDemi Lovato’s quarantine bae is 28-year-old soap opera star Max Ehrich, who has a neck tattoo, used to date Bella Thorne (tracks), and does indeed look the part of a thirst trap

THE BLEMISHLast weekend’s box office take was the lowest in the history of movie theaters, so remember that the name of the #1 movie in the country for that weekend was Phoenix, Oregon and you’ll be your team’s trivia night hero whenever people can congregate again

THE BLASTKourtney Kardashian is schooling her son Mason on how to be discreet on social media. I’m frankly surprised that the kid isn’t already a master of this very necessary skill (he’s ten), but then maybe his father already set him up with a burner IG account

LINKS Celebrity coronavirus conspiracy, Economy vs Life, Britney redistributes…

THE BLASTIn yet another sign that this is the dumbest of all possible worlds, evidently there’s a growing belief that celebrities? are being paid? to say they have coronavirus? The celebrity coronavirus conspiracy is I guess supposed to prove that this is all just media hype, though the families of the 20,000 people who’ve died of the disease so far would probably beg to differ. Anyway Idris Elba called the conspiracy “absolute bullshit,” which would end this whole non-debate if he were already James Bond

CELEBITCHYAnd speaking of conspiracy theories, walking superliminal message Donald Trump now thinks this whole quarantine thing has gone on long enough, and America needs to “reopen” its economy before more fantastically wealthy people become just boring old regular wealthy. For those of you keeping track, it was two weeks — from March 9 to March 22 — that Trump took COVID-19 seriously. The last time my four-year-old wanted a big special toy, the kid had to help clean up the playroom every day for three weeks to get it. It took three weeks because there were some setbacks, but this child did it. So the next time you see someone compare Trump’s temperament to that of a little kid, correct them

JEZEBELIn more dire economic news, Texas Lieutenant Governor Dan Patrick said he believes America’s grandparents — the people at highest risk for coronaviral infection — are 100% willing to die when we “reopen” the economy by sending people back into their petri dish workplaces, because their deaths will have saved the economy for the grandkids those now-dead grandparents will no longer be able to play with or hug or spoil rotten. Because they’ll be dead

DLISTEDBritney Spears shared a quote about love and community by the writer Mimi Zhu and because the quote contains the phrase “re-distribute wealth” now there’s just a ton of clickbait-y pieces out there detailing Britney’s newfound role as a comrade. But you know what, that’s actually fine right now, because…

VOX…the economic outlook for your favorite websites isn’t especially rosy right now, either. Generally speaking, traffic is up everywhere, because people have more time on their hands; but ad revenue is down and dropping because when companies have to contract suddenly and severely, advertising budgets are always among the first things to get slashed. This is all by way of saying that if you can find it in your heart to read a click on more pages than normal the next time you’re on the toilet, to share an extra article or two with an old friend who you know loves some trashy TV, to recommend a new site or two to a distant cousin via text or a goofy neighbor from a safe 6+ foot distance, it would mean a lot to the people who write for those sites

REALITY TEAIn more upbeat gossip: both Vanderpump Rules stars Brandi Glanville and Scheana Marie have now both confirmed that they slept with an unnamed actor from The Notebook. All we can say for sure is that Scheana appeared to shoot down the possibility that it was James Marsden. Let the speculation commence

THE BLEMISHIt’s been four years since the peak of the Taylor Swift-Kanye West feud, but these are even stranger, more dire times, so some anonymous benefactor revealed the (almost) full phone call between the two while Kanye was working on his now-infamous track “Reputation.” Depending on whose side of the feud you’re on, you can kinda convince yourself that the new audio proves either Kanye or Taylor was in the right all along

LAINEY GOSSIPNot that that’s stopping Taylor Swift and Kim Kardashian from going back at it. This is my favorite headline of the day so far: “Taylor vs Kim: A Social Distancing Petty-Off”

GO FUG YOURSELFIn further Kim Kardashian news, the 2020 Fug Madness top seed has been dominating the early rounds, but she’s now up against some of the truly questionable fashion decisions that Winnie Harlow made last year

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP – Finally, some financial pettiness in the high-gloss world of televised home renovation: “Former Flipping Out Star Jeff Lewis is Being Sued By Ex Gage Edward for Allegedly Failing to Repay $125,000 Loan”

LINKS Sophie Turner’s PSA, Ellen is a meanie, Little Women LA tragedy…

CELEBITCHYSansa Stark has a message for everyone not committed to social distancing and / or straight-up quarantine right now. (Paraphrased, it’s “Stay the f*ck home, idiots.”) But Sophie Turner’s PSA is really directed at celebrities like Vanessa Hudgens and Evangeline Lilly who don’t understand why this is so important and who then talk about it out loud, helping inspire further idiocy

DLISTEDThere’s an entire Twitter thread devoted to people sharing anecdotes about how mean Ellen DeGeneres is in real life, specifically so the dude who originated the thread will donate more and more money to charity. I think this is great, and not just for my profession — there have to be *tons* more A-list celebs who cultivate an air of public benevolence, but who are absolute shits to the “little people” around them. And we need more tea on those celebrities

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPCondolences to Little Women: LA star Christy McGinity, whose baby daughter Violet died yesterday at just 17 days old. Violet was born seven weeks premature; Christy and her boyfriend Gonzo Carazo spent every day by Violet’s side in the NICU

VOXWe could also have avoided a lot of trouble over the last few years if the networks had never given airtime to any of Donald Trump’s daily thoughts on anything at all, let alone a still-worsening viral pandemic. But I kind of doubt they’re going to all of a sudden stop now

THE BLEMISHIf you haven’t seen this video of a naked, bathtub-bound Madonna burying and praising COVID-19 in about equal measure, you need to do yourself a favor and click straightaway

JEZEBELThe “perfect playroom” is total aspirational bullshit, but that doesn’t stop hopeful parents (*raises hand* from organizing and reorganizing and cleaning it in hopes of preserving, for at least a moment, the elusive Platonic ideal

THE BLAST“Meryl Streep’s Daughter Grace Gummer Files For Divorce, Mr. Robot Star Was Secretly Married!”

REALITY TEA“NeNe Leakes Argues With Kandi Burruss For Shading Her In Confessionals On Real Housewives Of Atlanta

LAINEY GOSSIP“Exactly a week after one of the most cryptic album announcements, Donald Glover officially released his highly anticipated fourth studio album called 03.15.20. Before we get into the album itself, let’s talk about its release because it is so interesting and SO strange”

GO FUG YOURSELFEnjoy the relative stability and comfort of known routines, like the 2020 Fug Madness tournament still going on despite its athletic counterpart having been canceled weeks (months? years? feels like at least years) ago

LINKS Harvey Weinstein has coronavirus, Quaranting coping, Bethenny Frankel’s silver lining…

DLISTEDHarvey Weinstein keeps finding new and terrible ways to get himself in headlines. Mere weeks after the convicted rapist was hospitalized with chest pains following his sentencing on rape charges, we discover that Harvey Weinstein has coronavirus and is in isolation at a prison facility in upstate New York

VOXIn more big name coronavirus news, noted neighbor-haver and US Senator Rand Paul has contracted the disease. Paul apparently exposed enough of his colleagues to the virus that Republicans won’t have a Senate majority for at least a couple of weeks

THE BLASTAnd in *good* coronavirus news, Tom Hanks and his wife Rita Wilson have passed their two week quarantine with no further symptoms. It’s not “vaccine available for everyone”-level good news, but I think at this point we’ll take Tom Hanks’ safe recovery with a smile and a Skyped-in high-five

CELEBITCHYKristen Stewart may have broken California’s shelter-in-place order with her quarantine relief hike, but then getting outside is a requirement for human sanity. And if anyone serious calls her on it, she can always point the finger at the photographer who snapped these shots of her in the first place

REALITY TEA“Bethenny Frankel Says Coronovirus Relief Brought Her Closer To Boyfriend Paul Bernon”

JEZEBELIf you don’t mind having your heart absolutely broken, here’s one story of how coronavirus-based restaurant closures are driving even more low- and middle-income earners out of the Bay Area, which in turn makes the place even less of a cultural and spiritual beacon than it had already become

THE BLEMISHSpeaking of food, here’s a handy guide to the best instructional cooking channels YouTube has to offer. Because, honestly, “you probably can’t cook as well as you think you can. I’m sure you can make a few dishes, but can you really cook?”

LAINEY GOSSIPLana Del Rey is single again, was spotted with “a friend” in LA just before the California lockdown commenced, and will maybe get together with Brad Pitt?

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“Randall Emmett Confirms His Wedding to Vanderpump Rules Star Lala Kent Has Been Postponed Due to Pandemic: How They’re Dealing”

GO FUG YOURSELFFinally, enjoy this nostalgic trip back to the faraway land of 2002 with this glamorous throwback photo gallery of King Willem-Alexander’s marriage to Queen Maxima

LINKS Coronavirus cash grab, #ReleaseTheButtholeCut, Octavia Spencer’s advice…

JEZEBELRepublican businesswoman Kelly Loeffler, who also happens to be married to the chairman of the New York Stock Exchange, is one of several US senators to make millions of dollars selling stocks after a private briefing on COVID-19 literally months before the general public was warned about how serious the virus is. Loeffler’s coronavirus cash grab alone appears to have netted her around three million dollars

THE BLEMISHThere is apparently a version of Cats that features all the cats’ CGI buttholes. Those buttholes were later edited out of the version of Cats that made it to theaters. And we must all be out of shows and movies to binge, because now fans of ruby star cinema are demanding to see the “Butthole Cut” of Cats, a movie that, who knows, may actually be improved dramatically by the presence of cat buttholes a-plenty

CELEBITCHYAcademy Award-winner Octavia Spencer didn’t *present* this as advice in her recent interview on The Daily Show; given current circumstances, I’m choosing to take her words as advice and suggest them as advice for others

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“Blowups, Breakdowns, Bar Fights & Bear Smoochin’: MTV Releases ‘Total Madness’ Super Trailer for The Challenge Season 35″

THE BLASTSpeaking of binging entertainment, here’s another helpful list of stuff you maybe haven’t gotten to yet. This list was actually more helpful for me in straightening out a misconception I didn’t even realize I’d held: Lucifer, a show I have never seen one minute of, is not only not the Buffy spin-off Angel, it’s in no way related to Buffy at all

GO FUG YOURSELFAnd in other, supremely important entertainment news, here’s a helpful explainer of how you can help websites — like GFY, yes, and also this very one you’re reading! — in our current era of despair

REALITY TEAIf Thomas Ravenel hadn’t already gotten the boot from Southern Charm over domestic violence allegations, he may well have been let go for spouting racist coronavirus conspiracy theories

DLISTEDA Tale of Two Celebrities: Lost star Daniel Dae Kim has tested positive for coronavirus and used social media to offer a calm, helpful, important little speech about the importance social distancing and quarantining. Meanwhile, Lost star Evangeline Lilly — whose father, suffering from stage four lukemia, is living with Lilly — called the pandemic a simple “flu” and said she’s conducting business as usual

VOXSpain, like the United States, was slow to mobilize against coronavirus. However, unlike the US, Spain has been fast to enact and enforce countrywide quarantining over the past couple of weeks. Consider this both a cautionary tale about what to (maybe) expect in America and a tragedy about what might have been if we’d acted sooner

LAINEY GOSSIPFinally, here’s a beautiful little bit of nostalgia for you to devour: “Romeo Must Die turns 20″

LINKS Oprah sex trafficking hoax, Amanda Bynes pregnant, Jax and Brittany married…

JEZEBELRest assured that the Oprah sex trafficking hoax is just that. But, if you hadn’t heard about this particular bit of viral nonsense, strap yourself in for a doozy! (And remember that it only took the length of a fitful night’s sleep for this 100% fake story to trend #1 on Twitter)

THE BLEMISHIt turns out that Amanda Bynes, still in recovery and recently un-engaged to her now ex Paul Michael, is pregnant with her first child

REALITY TEAAt least one unending wait is now over: Vanderpump Rules stars Brittany Cartweight and Jax Taylor were finally married on last night’s episode. MVP of the ceremony went to Tom Sandoval; looks like the over / under on the length of the marriage is around two years

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPIn other Vanderpump Rules news (and in an unfortunate turn toward the COVID-19 portion of today’s links post), “Star Scheana Shay Slammed Online for Making Light of Quarantine Advisories; Later Backpedals on Refusal to Stay Home”

LAINEY GOSSIPHowever, Scheana’s snafu isn’t nearly as bad — or potentially career-ending! — as that of Vanessa Hudgens, who had this to say about the still-expanding coronavirus pandemic: “Like, ya. People are going to die. Which is like terrible…but…inevitable?”

CELEBITCHYMaybe Reese Witherspoon has used this line before (and maybe it’s not her line to begin with), but it’s new to me and I think it’s pretty great. In her new Vanity Fair cover interview, Reese says, “I always say, ‘Funny doesn’t sag.’ I always just wanted to be funny.”

THE BLASTPatton Oswalt brought joy to the masses by doing impromptu stand-up in front of his house. By “masses” I mean his millions of Twitter followers, since COVID kept all but three of Patton’s neighbors indoors. The little girl steals the show

DLISTEDYou can’t go out to the movies for the foreseeable future, but you can stream Cats from the comfort of your home. Yes, that Cats. On the one hand, I don’t know how that’s supposed to make anyone feel better; on the other, why was the studio holding it back for a regular release such that a coronavirus-inspired *early* release was possible at all?

GO FUG YOURSELFMarch Madness is canceled; Fug Madness lives on

VOXFinally, here’s a little light reading for right before you go to bed: “This pandemic will expose who we are as a country: ‘We’re bumping up against the limits of excessive American individualism and market society.'”

LINKS Coachella postponed, Brandi Glanville’s new tea, Drag Race controversy…

THE BLASTUnlike SXSW 2020, Coachella postponed will give ticketholders the chance to attend the make-up dates in a few months. The California desert festival announced it’s pushing its April dates back to October due to coronavirus fears; South By Southwest is still getting roasted from all corners for refusing refunds after canceling this year for the same reason

REALITY TEARHOBH star emeritus Brandi Glanville still has some tea to spill on plenty of her fellow Bravo reality players, including Kenya Moore and Countess Luann

LAINEY GOSSIPRuPaul’s Drag Race Season 12 contestant Sherry Pie has been booted from the show following revelations that Sherry catfished at least seven different actors by posing as a casting director on social media and promising big roles in exchange for “compromising and often sexual messages and audition tapes”

CELEBITCHYThe President of the United States is “definitely melting down” over coronavirus

VOXOn that note, should America be grateful that a couple of powerful billionaires are “stepping in on the coronavirus where the government has failed”?

JEZEBEL“The Associated Press reports that Ashley Forbes, 32, and husband, Matthew Forbes, 35, allegedly made six different beer runs at two Targets in East Baton Rouge, ultimately stealing a total of $1000 in beer between February 24 and February 29. They were spotted on security cameras and ultimately arrested on Sunday, when Matthew Forbes was caught trying to stuff a drill in his pants in Walmart.”

DLISTED“Kumail Najiani Says That Getting Buff Gave Him Body Dysmorphia”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPLittle Women: LA Star Christy McGinity & Boyfriend Gonzo Carazo Welcome First Child Together; Baby Born Seven Weeks Premature”

GO FUG YOURSELFAnd speaking of little women, here’s Greta Gerwig wearing a dress made out of either the best quilt or the busiest tablecloth of all time

THE BLEMISHJust a week after undergoing surgery for an undisclosed heart problem, convicted rapist Harvey Weinstein fell down and hit his head while imprisoned and awaiting sentencing at Rikers Island. Apparently Harvey’s “head throbs all the time,” a likely consequence of decades of guilt and shame now catching up to him

LINKS William Shatner’s horse semen, Weinstein heart surgery, Kristen Doute burns bridges…

DLISTEDThe man’s marriage may be over, but William Shatner’s horse semen will be his forever. Shatner’s divorce settlement with ex-wife Elizabeth gives Shatner ownership of the now-former couple’s two horses, all breeding equipment, and “all horse semen” currently in storage. Pretty standard thoroughbred agreement, really

CELEBITCHYHarvey Weinstein is finally off to prison after being convicted on rape charges, after first having to be hospitalized with the heart trouble that comes when years of hidden guilt and shame come crashing down inside a person

REALITY TEAVanderpump Rules star Kristen Doute, addressing her ongoing and bitter feud with co-stars Stassi Schroeder and Katie Maloney, says she doesn’t “care if we are never friends again” following Kristen’s affair with Jax Taylor (plus untold further messiness)

VOXThe biggest and most prestigious venture capital firm in America is warning its people to prepare for the worst when it comes to coronavirus. So, good luck to the rest of us, I guess

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“MTV Releases Cast List & First Trailer for The Challenge Season 35: Get Ready for “Total Madness!””

JEZEBELHere is a sadly relatable story about a failure to buy two of an item of clothing that you really, really like

GO FUG YOURSELFStella McCartney’s latest fashion show closed with a person in a cow costume. This article doubles as a clever bit of click-through embedding, since you’ll have to scroll through 52 other photos before getting to the chuckle (and don’t be faked out by the huge dotted print in #38)

LAINEY GOSSIP“Demi Lovato wasn’t OK for a while, as we know. And we know because she’s been candid about relapse and recovery, about her mental health issues. For many people, speaking openly about their personal struggles helps to address shame and stigma; Demi continues to take this approach now that she is coming back into the spotlight with several new projects”

THE BLASTHow has Dancing With The Stars not had same-sex couples until now?

THE BLEMISHTyga knows, but he isn’t telling (yet)