Welcome to the inaugural edition of Tabloid Covers Weekly, your first look at all the major tabloid covers for the week with all the headlines and links to the sites. (We’re going to do this every Wednesday so be sure to check back every week for the newest gossip and shocking stories from the world of celebrities!)

Consider this a serious heads up to those of you who read starcasm and could possibly be effected by this recent news. Pfizer has recalled a million possibly mispackaged birth control blister packs. Find out which blister packets of the pill are being recalled and what you need to do if this effects you.

It’s not often I get to do a post about a photo of a piece of furniture (I think the closest I have come is when I wrote about Teresa Giudice’s bankruptcy auction), but today I get that rare opportunity thanks to the viral heebie jeebie inducing couch photo above. It might seem like your everyday sofa photo at first glance, but if you look long enough you might just poop your britches when you find yourself face to face with…

THE WOMAN BEHIND THE COUCH!

Dalisha Adams of Brooklyn, New York is accused of abandoning two of her young children on Sunday. The children were found lost on the streets near their grandmother’s house clutching diapers and bundled up for the currently cold weather. Read on to find out what she’s been charged with and to see a disturbing photo that popped up on her Facebook page while the police were still looking for her.