Daily Starbuzz

Shamea Morton pregnant

LINKS! Shamea Morton pregnant, Amal Clooney’s wedding fitting, Laxative brownie fail…

REALITY TEAShamea Morton of The Real Housewives of Atlanta used Mother’s Day to announce that she and her husband Gerald Mwangi are expecting their first child together. Congrats to them! Shamea is due “around Thanksgiving,” which means there’s plenty of time for all sorts of tabloid shenanigans regarding her uterus between now and RHOA’s season premiere

LAINEY GOSSIPIf you’re anything like me and find yourself oddly and increasingly fascinated by all things Royal Wedding, perhaps you’ll appreciate this tidbit on Amal Clooney’s wedding fitting. (Tl;dr: Amal tried on the dress she’s going to wear; they’re adjusting it; also we now know who is doing her hair). It’s all dumb as hell and I can’t look away

THE BLEMISHA Michigan woman had the cops called on her, got fired from her job, and was nearly arrested for merely planning on putting laxatives in her departing co-worker’s brownies. And honestly, at that point, I’m genuinely disappointed she didn’t just say ‘F*ck it’ and make the sh!tty brownies anyway

JEZEBEL“Martha Stewart and Snoop Became BFFs After He Accidentally Got Her Stoned on National Television”

CELEBITCHYEventually, Donald Trump did make it to the hospital to sit with Melania, who had “a surgical procedure to treat a kidney condition” and will be in the hospital for the rest of the week

VOXOh, right — *that’s* why America is now making China great again

DLISTEDBohemian Rhapsody, the big-budget Hollywood take on the Freddy Mercury saga, finally has a trailer and a release date. Hollywood biopics are uniformly terrible, and this movie has been in development hell for so long it may well turn out to be a disaster of Biblical proportions

LINKS! Why Pauley Perrette left NCIS, Monique Samuels’ drinking problem, Spike Lee’s new joint…

Why Pauley Perrette left NCIS 1

DLISTEDLast year, Pauley Perrette announced her departure from NCIS without really giving a reason. This week, following her final episode, Perrette implied it was due to multiple physical assaults and a “rich, powerful publicity machine” keeping her silent

REALITY TEARHOP star Monique Samuels swears she doesn’t have a drinking problem and says “it was funny” that she fell asleep at the wheel after lunchtime drinks because “it was a girls trip”

JEZEBELSpike Lee’s new film BlacKkKlansman got either a six- or a ten-minute standing ovation after its world premiere at Cannes. It’s based on a book written by Colorado Springs’ first black cop, set in the 70s, and features John David Washington and Adam Driver “collaborating to infiltrate a Klan chapter headed by David Duke.” Can’t imagine why it resonated so strongly

VOXWait a minute — now we’re making China great again?

CELEBITCHYQueen Elizabeth still prefers Kate to Meghan Markle and still DGAF who knows about it. Her handwritten consent for Meghan and Harry’s marriage does have some pretty nice formal scrollwork, though, so there’s that

THE BLEMISHJohn Cena went on Today to say he still loves his ex-fiancée Nikki Bella and still wants to have kids with her, so it looks like the two of them maybe possibly aren’t completely done as a couple

VERY SMART BROTHAS“If You’re Still Mad That People Didn’t Want You in High School, I Get It, but Please (for Your Own Sake) Get Over It”

LAINEY GOSSIPKirsten Dunst and Jesse Plemons had a baby boy last week and this week they announced that they’ve named their son Ennis Howard Plemons. Well-chosen! Congrats!

LINKS! Thomas Ravenel rape allegations, Cardi B is having a girl, What Fake News really means…

Thomas Ravenel rape allegations

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPBravo is now launching its own internal investigation following the allegation that Southern Charm star Thomas Ravenel raped a woman he met on Tinder in 2015

JEZEBELUnlike her drawn-out pregnancy reveal, Cardi B shared the news that she’s having a girl in the most laid-back, uncomplicated way possible: she told Howard Stern when he asked her. (Cardi also said it’s up to Offset to reveal the name, since he’s the one who picked it out.)

VOXDonald Trump finally admitted — via tweet — what (almost) everyone else has long known: “fake news” just means news that he doesn’t like because it’s unflattering for him personally

REALITY TEA Now Countess Luann thinks that maybe the reason she had her little Christmas Eve outburst and subsequent arrest is because somebody — possibly the fans who sent over a bottle of rosé at lunch — “slipped [her] something”

LAINEY GOSSIPJordan Peele announced his follow-up to Get Out: It’s called Us; it has an amazing cast; it looks like it will be about race and suburbia (and so by extension America); and it’s coming out next March. Unfortunately for Peele, all of America’s racial tension and social unrest will have been solved by then, so hopefully Us also has some good jokes

THE BLEMISHTaylor Swift, one of the biggest and wealthiest names in the music business, is still mad that some Kardashians called her names on social media one time. Also the screengrab for this article is hilarious; enjoy

CELEBITCHYJustin Theroux may be living out the next phase of his “edgy midlife crisis” by edging toward making his secret relationship with Emma Stone a public one

DLISTEDA Norwegian newspaper claims it has evidence that Tidal “jacked up the streams for Kanye’s The Life of Pablo and Beyonce’s Lemonade by over 300 million plays combined.” Their first hint that something untoward might be going on was the fact that Tidal only has about three million subscribers

LINKS! Zendaya of Arc, ScarJo’s Met Gala fail?, Sanaa Lathan face-biting claims…

Zendaya of Arc

LAINEY GOSSIPThe award for best interpretation of the Met Gala theme should probably go to Zendaya, who took “Heavenly Bodies” both literally and figuratively and went dressed as Joan of Arc

CELEBITCHYScarlett Johansson is getting dragged pretty thoroughly for wearing a Marchesa bridesmaid’s dress to the Met Gala. Among the people grateful for her choice: both Kylie and Kris Jenner, who ignored the theme completely and looked way worse

DLISTEDSanaa Lathan would like you to know that she is not the still-mystery celebrity who allegedly bit Beyonce’s face at a party a few months ago. She also blames social media for the story blowing up, which at this point is honestly one of the most grandparent-y things a person can say (other than “Put a post-it on whatever you want me to leave you”)

JEZEBELRoman Polanski, who raped a child 41 years ago and was kicked out of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for it last week, is now threatening to sue the Academy for failing to give “reasonable notice of the charges against him.” I know I’m not alone in hoping the Academy takes him up on his demand for “a fair hearing to present his position” on why raping a minor and then fleeing the country to avoid criminal charges shouldn’t get him the boot from this organization

REALITY TEACountess Luann says the reason she was able to move on fight-free after coming face-to-face with both Missy and Carole Radziwill on RHONY is because she’s “not a grudge holder.” That’s a funny way to pronounce “On parole and thus my best behavior”

THE BLEMISHHot take: “This Year’s Met Gala May Be The Dumbest Yet!”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPJersey Shore star Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino has been sober for 28 months — congrats!

VOXDon Blankenship, the race-baiting felon whose negligence as a coal company CEO led to the death of 29 miners, lost the Republican primary for a Senate seat by coming in…a strong third. Congratulations, West Virginians, on sort of rejecting him

Pope Rihanna 2

LINKS! Pope Rihanna blesses the Met, Karen Huger’s tax dodging, the Trumps’ sad marriage…

DLISTEDRihanna unofficially won the 2018 Met Gala by dressing up in high fashion’s classiest Sexy Pope Halloween costume. That headpiece could have come straight from Benedict’s own closet

REALITY TEAKaren Huger is trying to have it both ways with her husband’s tax problems, telling Andy Cohen “I really did not know” about them and then literally an instant later saying “He did mention it to me” and told her he was “handling it”

CELEBITCHYIt turns out the secret to the Trumps’ marriage is never seeing each other and acting not at all like a married couple who have things in common and a history together. “They spend very little to no time together,” according to a juicy and extensive new feature on their marriage

JEZEBELThe Rock would like all of his fans to know that he’s no DJ Khaled when it comes to the bedroom

THE BLEMISHThe new quiet theory about Kanye’s behavior is that the whole thing is a performance piece inspired by some avant garde-y 1970s artists and a member of Kanye’s inner circle. After reading through this well-documented and surprisingly lucid Twitter thread explaining it, I have to say it sounds more logical than anything Kanye himself has said over the last few weeks

VOXScientists are still debating whether or not Pluto is a planet. You can take our definitions, science, but you’ll never take our hearts

VERY SMART BROTHAS“20 Questions About Avengers: Infinity War From a Guy Who Just Watched It and Still Might Be Very Confused”

LAINEY GOSSIPLast September, Lena Waithe won an Emmy and used her speech to thank her “LGBTQIA family” who every day “puts on their imaginary cape and go out there and conquer the world.” Last night, Lena wore a very real LGBTQIA cape to the Met Gala and damn near stole the show from Rihanna looking like a Marvel superhero unto herself

LINKS! Rudy exposes Trump’s lie, Kanye gets dunked on, Timberlake’s Spicy fling…

VOXRudy Giuliani, who is now one of Donald Trump’s attorneys, went on Fox last night and said that Trump did in fact know about the hush money payments to Stormy Daniels despite Trump saying last month that he didn’t. At this point, only an attorney could keep up with all the lies

THE BLEMISHHere are all the best reactions to Kanye’s “Slavery was a choice” misstep, including a few notable for their facepalm-worthiness

JEZEBEL…but *which* Spice Girl did you sleep with back in the day, Justin Timberlake? (Hint: Her nickname rhymes with “Labey”)

DLISTEDGetting back to Kanye for a second, it seems that Kim Kardashian is now worried that her fans will think she has the same beliefs as her husband unless she speaks up. This, not voluntary nudity, is what you’ll find at the intersection of capitalism and feminism

CELEBITCHYAccording to Kevin Smith’s doctor, smoking a big fat joint right before having a heart attack probably helped to save Smith’s life because he managed to stay relatively calm throughout the ordeal. It’s almost as though scientists don’t think marijuana is as dangerous as politicians do

REALITY TEA“Dorinda Medley Doesn’t Regret Causing Drama Between Sonja Morgan & Tinsley Mortimer”

LAINEY GOSSIPAnd speaking of complicated legal battles, here’s a rundown of Johnny Depp’s courtroom woes, which basically all boils down to he’s “a sh-tty client.” Depp is also replacing lawyers at a pace the president would admire

LINKS! Kanye keeps talking, Tom Brokaw sexual misconduct allegations, R. Kelly’s sex cult problems…

DLISTED“Strangely enough, Kanye didn’t also say that Jewish people willingly went to concentration camps because they wanted a free vacation? He’s probably saving that for his next visit to TMZ.”

JEZEBELThree women have now accused Tom Brokaw of sexual misconduct; the third woman, freelance journalist Mary Reinholz, says that Brokaw gave her “a French kiss…abruptly” and without consent 50 years ago while the two were working on a story together

THE BLEMISHOne of R. Kelly’s new defenses against claims he’s kept women of color as sex slaves in his alleged sex cult is to suggest that the women accusing him of all that are attempting a “public lynching” of his good name

REALITY TEAMarlo Hampton says there are “no receipts” to prove the RHOA cast’s allegations that she’s a prostitute. Which means any day now we should have Kenya Moore claiming she can come up with some

CELEBITCHYTracy Anderson promotes sex in general and masturbation in particular as important “self-care” in a new Health Magazine interview, and she is not wrong on either count

VOXIt turns out Mark Ruffalo accidentally spoiled the ending of Avengers: Infinity War a year ago and everybody just thought it was a joke

VERY SMART BROTHAS“When [Bill Cosby] wasn’t judging [black people], he was playing a role model on television and simultaneously pissing all over the moral high ground he sought by being a terrible human being and using his power and influence to get away with it.”

LAINEY GOSSIPZayn Malik and Gigi Hadid are officially unofficially back together, and here’s proof in the form of a photo gallery of the two of them making out hard in broad daylight in New York

LINKS! Michelle Wolf tells jokes, Miley’s topless non-apology, Avengers bigger than Star Wars…

CELEBITCHYMichelle Wolf, who is a comedian known for telling funny jokes about uncomfortable subjects, hosted the White House Correspondents’ Dinner this weekend. True to form, she told a bunch of funny jokes about the uncomfortable subject that is the relationship between the media and the Trump White House. The media is now dragging its outrage into a four-day story

JEZEBELThe other things you need to know about Michelle Wolf’s set are that she didn’t actually mock Sarah Huckabee Sanders’ appearance and also apparently Eric Trump doesn’t understand Twitter

DLISTEDMiley Cyrus has officially un-apologized for posing topless with a sheet over her chest for Vanity Fair as a 15-year-old back in 2008. “I’M NOT SORRY,” Miley said, dispelling any notions otherwise. She followed that up with a two-word phrase that rhymes with “yuck poo”

VOXThe Avengers is now officially bigger than Star Wars. Let the hot takes commence

REALITY TEAAs far as Erika Jayne is concerned, Dorit Kemsley “carried” RHOBH this season. “I know she gets a bad rap, but at the end of the day, you need somebody like that on the show,” she added, while literally every viewer nodded agreement

THE BLEMISH“Instagram Model Sued for ‘Sexually Assaulting’ Dog”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPThe Jersey Shore reboot has been such a success that MTV is rush-releasing four similar party shows over the next few months. Get ready for Made In Kentucky, Too Stupid To Die, Just The Tattoo of Us, and Staten Island 10310, all of which are real titles

LAINEY GOSSIPAnd speaking of The Avengers, the Bro Triangle between Matt Damon, Chris Hemsworth, and Ben Affleck half-jokes, half-rages on. It must be getting a little sad for Ben, waiting by the phone while Matt and Chris are off splashing and laughing in Australia for weeks at a time. At least he has the Batsuit to wear