Category: Entertainment News

CELEBITCHY - In fairytale wedding news, Prince Henry and Meghan Markle's forthcoming nuptuals will include, but not be limited to: a horse-carriage ride through the streets of Windsor; a vow exchange at St. George's Chapel helmed by the Archbishop of Canterbury; and literal golden tickets to the reception. Veruca Salt still wants two VERY SMART BROTHAS - The Obamas' official portraits went public today. People have thoughts on them! The growing consensus is that Michelle got the better look, continuing her unbroken streak of winning every public head-to-head against Barack THE BLEMISH - YouTube suspended Logan Paul not because he is an insufferable douchebag, but because he gets YouTube consistent bad press (because he is an insufferable douchebag). Reddit banned FakeApp for the same reason. Basically, every "content creator" is still at the mercy of his platform, because those platforms are more corporation than outlet for free speech CELEBUZZ - And speaking of YouTube, Shay Mitchell from Pretty Little Liars promised her assistant she'd go streaking around LA if she ever got three million subscribers. She hit the milestone last week, promptly dropped trou, and hit the bricks, leaving her assistant running to catch up. Shay Mitchell is raising the bar for content creators everywhere UPROXX - In more social media news, Instagram will now notify you if someone takes a screenshot of your story; they'll also tell you who took the screenshot (assuming the person is logged in). But it will only work for stories, not regular posts. And there's already a loophole DLISTED - Slow your roll, everyone who was excited by last week's news that the Spice Girls were reuniting for a world tour: Posh "Victoria" Spice now says that the tour isn't happening, though the group will get back together for...something REALITY TEA - If you have dated Kristen Doute, you have had your phone ransacked by Kristen Doute. Also, if you are Lisa Vanderpump, Kristen Doute has stolen cutlery from your restaurant (and so has every other employee) VOX - American figure skater Mirai Nagasu's triple axel at the Olympics was somewhat overshadowed by the American commentators' over-the-top reaction to it, but still really cool and impressive and worthy of all the superlatives it's been getting. Here's a tidy explainer on why the axel is such an elusive and tricky jump. Bonus: The article includes an official scoresheet, which is super helpful if you're like me and haven't been able to figure out why some skaters' scores -- like, say, Adam Rippon's -- aren't as high as their performances would appear to merit JEZEBEL - In other skating news: Ice dancing is ballroom dancing combined with barely-legal-in-public dry humping, so tune in if you haven't been LAINEY GOSSIP - 20-year-old Camila Cabello's new boyfriend is a 30-year-old dating expert named Matthew Hussey. Matthew, who coaches woman, uses the professional mantra "Get The Guy," which is passive-aggressive enough to remind me of the bit in Trainwreck where Amy Schumer is arguing with Bill Hader and she chides him for saying he likes going down on her. Anyway, here's a photo of Camila and Matthew looking happy and cuddling on a Mexican beach

There will officially be more love after Love After Lockup! WE tv announced today that their new prison romance reality series will be returning for an expanded 10-episodes season in 2019.

DLISTED - Pepsi is following the hygiene industry's lead and developing a snack chip just for women. (ICYMI: Pepsi owns Frito-Lay and Doritos.) CEO Indra Nooyi seems to think that women don't like the fact that Cheeto powder sticks to your fingers and you have to lick it off...but isn't that the best part about eating Cheetos? REALITY TEA - Former RHONJ star Dina Manzo is getting dragged a little bit for the advice she gave Kylie Jenner upon the birth of Kylie's first child. But the advice amounts to "Don't make having a kid at 20 look too glamorous since you have it super easy and your fans are impressionable," which seems like a pretty sensible, telling-it-like-it-is-on-a-sitcom thing to say CELEBITCHY - Justin Timberlake's Prince tribute at the Super Bowl halftime show was definite pandering, considering the two had a longstanding beef. Also, Timberlake's outfit was both ugly and ridiculous -- you can't wear a vaguely camo-looking suit on top of a shirt with deer on it. The idea is to not get shot by hunters THE BLEMISH - No, McDonald's French fries do not cure baldness, help make you thinner, and lower your blood pressure. If they did, America's current president would appear to the rest of the world the way he sees himself in the mirror JEZEBEL - Tom Golisano, a billionaire, is so enraged that by the geese that poop on his upstate New York property that he's refusing to pay a $90,000 school tax until authorities step in and deal with the problem. "Deal with" apparently means "Kill all the geese, since how else do you stop them (or anything!) from pooping? Plus, couldn't he just apply for a hunting license and take care of this problem in one weekend? The ensuing cookout would be a lot more endearing than withholding $90,000 from kids VOX - Speaking of goose poop, Ram took a Martin Luther King Jr. speech about as far out of context as they possibly could in using it to sell trucks with their Super Bowl commercial. Here's what the speech actually says VERY SMART BROTHAS - And here's why Ram taking Martin Luther King Jr.'s words about as far out of context as they possibly could in using it to sell trucks with their Super Bowl commercial matters LAINEY GOSSIP - The trailer for the new Jurassic Park movie debuted during the Super Bowl. It looked neat! But it revealed the inherent flaw in the franchise's formula: it's pretty much the same premise in every movie. (See also: Home Alone; Star Wars) CELEBUZZ - Here are the best memes involving the #SelfieKid who was more absorbed with his phone than Justin Timberlake dancing next ho him at the Super Bowl halftime show UPROXX - And here's every Super Bowl commercial in one place, complete with a handy list of winning and losing commercials for you to argue over  

DLISTED - Tom Hanks is going to play Mr. Rogers in a forthcoming biopic called You Are My Friend. It sounds like this particular movie might avoid the biopic's cardinal sin of trying to cram an entire life into two-and-a-half bloated Oscar-intended hours, and will instead focus on a brief period in Mr. Rogers' life. Good news all around! REALITY TEA - Stephen McGee claims his recently avowed enemy and Summer House co-star Carl Radke "f*cked Scheana Marie" back in early December, though he gave some eyebrow-raising details as evidence CELEBITCHY - Apparently Lorde didn't perform at the Grammys because the powers that be only asked her to sing as part of the Tom Petty tribute and not to do a song solo. Though Lorde was up for Album of the Year, the show's producer defended the decision by saying "We can't have every nominee perform." To which any rational observer might respond: Why did the other AOTY nominees get to do so? JEZEBEL - Among the praise Nicole Kidman had for the bugs she ate on-camera for a Vanity Fair piece: "Awesome. Like nothing you’ve ever tasted. Like...a hairy...nut." THE BLEMISH - It really *is* easy to forget that Blue Ivy is just six years old in this clip of her shushing her parents at the Grammys... VERY SMART BROTHAS - ...until you see the pics of Beyonce holding snacks and a juice box for her daughter during commercial breaks VOX - The Cleveland Indians are going to stop using their mascot, Chief Wahoo, beginning with the 2019 baseball season. Dan Snyder's double-down response forthcoming LAINEY GOSSIP - The dance Rihanna was doing at the Grammys is called Gwara Gwara; it's from South Africa. Here's that, plus a photo gallery of the woman doing what she does UPROXX - Norm Macdonald is apparently going to join the ranks of David Letterman with his very own talk show on Netflix. The only thing that could be better is if Norm just became Dave's permanent guest