They warned us this was going to happen.
When Paper rolled out its new cover with Kim Kardashian’s uncovered derrière, they said the only way to describe the pictures actually within the pages of the magazine is “holy f**king s**t.” Now we know why: Kim is totally nude. As in bare on the top, bottom, front and back… See for yourself in the uncensored pictures.
Reporter Amanda Fortini describes the 34-year-old mother-of-one as looking like this in person…
Unlike most people, she looks exactly the same in person as she does in photographs or on television, with one exception: she is smaller than she appears in images, with tiny, almost doll-like ears and feet and hands. Everything else about her seems amplified, tumescent. Her black hair is thicker than any you have ever seen, her lips fuller, her giant Bambi-eyes larger, their whites whiter, and the lashes that frame them longer. If some of this is the result of artificial enhancement — does anyone else have eyelashes that resemble miniature feather dusters? — none of it seems obviously ersatz. But that’s not to say it looks real, either. She is like a beautiful anime character come to life.
After the initial covers were released, sources said Kim’s two main reasons to do the risqué shoot were working with legendary photographer Jean-Paul Goude and showing off her body before hoping to get pregnant again.
The reactions to her now tame-looking first batch of photos were mixed.
How much longer do I have to look at Kim Kardashian's butt on my twitter feed? Ugh
— Candace Cameron Bure (@candacecbure) November 12, 2014
Let's be honest – Kim K did more for our troops today than most of you.
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) November 12, 2014
If you're complaining about @KimKardashian you probably have a front butt as big as her back butt. I'm not a fan of hers, but, god damn!
— Mia Tyler (@MiaTyler) November 12, 2014
Wait! I don't get it. No disrespect to Kim but… people are offended by my breastfeeding selfies & are fine with her (amazing) booty cover?
— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) November 12, 2014
Kim Kardashian, Belated congrats on your greazy tush
— Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) November 12, 2014
Let’s see what happens now… I’m going to very upset if Kim and Paper actually succeed in breaking the Internet.