“It was the breast of times, it was the worst of times…” That could easily have been the opening line of Melissa Gilbert’s New Year’s Eve blog post “A Tale of Two Titties” about having her breast plants removed. In the lengthy and humorous entry, the Little House On the Prairie actress reflects on her career in Hollywood and how from a very young age she was pressured into thinking she needed to “improve” her looks — which not only meant larger breasts, but an altered nose as well. She even revealed that during the last few seasons of Little House she “was made to wear a padded bra.”
Melissa, now 50, begins by listing two reasons why she has elected to have her implants removed: “A. I am concerned for my health and 2. I don’t like the way they look or feel,” she writes, adding, “Frankly, I’d like to be able to take a Zumba class without the fear that I’ll end up with two black eyes.” She then looks back on what made her originally decided to have breast augmentation surgery as well as a nose job while still a teen:
When I did the re-make of Splendor in the Grass (one of the worst performances of my career, by the way), those in charge, put me in a girdle, a corset, a padded bra and even painted cleavage on me! They also shaded the sides of my nose so it wouldn’t look so wide.
The message I got at the tender age of 17 was that-it was better for me to look like this:
Than this:
Which is how I looked two years later in the movie Sylvester. No make-up. no painted on cleavage. Just me. Though by then, the messages had been heard loud and clear and I’d had my nose fixed.
Melissa talks about the pressures on women in the spotlight to look a certain way and to obsess over weight issues, and she uses tabloid covers, billboards and an article on Heidi Montag’s numerous plastic surgery procedures as an example.
Melissa explains that her A-cup breasts grew to a size C-cup when she got pregnant with her son Dakota at the age of 24, but that didn’t last. “So, my milk disappeared and so did my boobs. They went back to their original size but…not their original place. They were lower….much, much lower. Not Magda in Something About Mary low but low…”
She reveals that her husband called her breasts at the time, “Socks full of marbles with knots at the top.”
(Does that sound like a harsh insensitive comment from a spouse? “A few years later we got divorced,” Melissa says. “Not only because of the sock comment. Although the sock comment was symptomatic of all that was wrong between us.”)
It was when Melissa found herself single and facing the prospect of having sex with another man for the first time that she decided to have breast augmentation surgery. “Not too big, just enough to fill up the ‘socks.'”
Melissa elected to go with saline implants because of the concern over silicon at the time. She would later give birth to her second son, Michael, 12 weeks early and during her pregnancy her breasts grew to the largest size they would ever be: 34EE!
^ Melissa Gilbert at the Nip Tuck Season Four Premiere Screening in 2006.
In 2004 Melissa was concerned after research suggested breast implants have a shelf life and should be replaced every 10-15 years. It had been 12 years since her initial procedure so she decided to swap them out — this time for silicone after her doctor convinced her of their merits. “Studies had shown that there was less possibility of leakage and contracture and they stayed softer and more natural and blah, blah, blah..”
Melissa then began to reflect on the implications of having breast implants on the rest of her life:
But, something was nagging at me. I couldn’t shake the idea that my implants had a shelf life. They would have to have them replaced every 10-15 years for the rest of my life. It was possible that at 80 years old I might have to get new implants! Huh?? I also began thinking a lot about the silicone in my body and what might go wrong.
She looked into a procedure to have them removed and found a surgeon in Santa Monica who specialized in this surgery. Melissa says she “even saw this physician’s work first hand. Her work was just beautiful so I met with her.”
She walked me through the procedure and recovery. I was then given a print out of all the details; 9-12 hours of surgery!!! $38,000.00 in costs that my insurance would absolutely not cover!!! And that cost was not including my stay at the recovery place with the nurses etc for $900.00 per night! What the f***ing f***!
There was no way! There was no way I was going under anesthesia for 9-12 hours for elective surgery. No f***ing way. And if I’m being totally honest, there was no way I could afford it. You know all of those “How much Celebrities are Worth” websites? like this one…
http://www.celebritynetworth.com/richest-celebrities/actors/melissa-gilbert-net-worth/
It’s a bunch of bullsh!t!
Melissa would eventually find a surgeon in Michigan that could do the procedure in 2-4 hours for “considerably less than $38,000.00.” Melissa had a breast MRI after Christmas and her “sweet husband” Timothy Busfield went with her. “He is perfectly supportive of my decision to do this,” Melissa says. (No “sock full of rocks” from this guy!) “He only wants me to be healthy,” she adds.
“My surgery is next week,” Melissa said on New Year’s Eve. “As soon as I feel well enough post-op, I am going to attempt to blog my way through this process.”
We can’t wait! Until then, Melissa reminds us “Aging is a gift not a curse. Love yourself. You are perfectly beautiful. You are enough.”
She maintains her humor as she signs off with:
Wishing you the happiest of New Years,
xoxo,
Tits McGee
You really need to go read Melissa’s full article, and be sure to stay tuned to her blog for post-surgery updates!
(I feel I must add, given Melissa’s humorous tone throughout her post, that I am surprised that she never referred to her smaller breasts as “little houses on the prairie.”) 😉
UPDATE – Melissa updated fans via Twitter on Tuesday:
In recovery. Surgery went great. No the recovery begins.
#boobies!
— Melissa Gilbert (@MelissaEGilbert) January 6, 2015
