VIDEO Michael Bolton’s ‘School of Michael Bolton,’ kids freed from Steel Bars

Michael Bolton: Yeah, well at least your name isn’t Michael Bolton.
Samir: You know there’s nothing wrong with that name.
Michael Bolton: There was nothing wrong with it… until that no-talent a** clown became famous and started winning Grammys.
Samir: Hmm… well why don’t you just go by Mike instead of Michael?
Michael Bolton: No way! Why should I change? He’s the one who sucks.

– From the 1999 Mike Judge motion picture “Office Space.”

As a parent in these often difficult times the question of where you’re going to send your little darling to school can be an exhaustive and mind-boggling decision.  If you don’t believe me check out this documentary.  Well have no fear mom and dad help is on the way from none other than Michael Bolton.  That’s right you can send your little bean to learn from the master at Michael Bolton’s School of Michael Bolton.  Check it out: 

“When Michael Bolton’s through with your child they will sound like a Michael Bolton angel”

This is really a great skit from Jimmy Kimmel Live.  Just seeing MB frees me from the Steel Bars that are wrapped around me.  It is easy to see that When a Man Loves a Woman he should send their child to his school and with Time Love and Tenderness they can grow in the ways of Bolton.  Michael Bolton I love you man.  Wait I Said I Loved You But I Lied but I really do think that the Michael Bolton School of Michael Bolton is a beautiful place.

Just to remind you of the power of Bolton here is a clip from when the world was right and the real legendary Michael and his mullet dominated the airwaves:

I need some tissues and the registration number for that school. Thank you Michael Bolton.