Could Jersey Shore get any more Jersey shore?!? I keep thinking not, but just about every Thursday night I am humbled by these
8 7 cast members’ abilities to raise the Guidodom bar! Last night was no exception (Yeah, I actually tuned into Jersey Shore and flipped over to the Alabama/Texas game during commercials) as we got to meet Vinny’s entire extended family, who along with the folks living in the beach house were all treated to an Italian buffet thanks to Vinny’s mom. (Guidodom isn’t all hook-ups, fist pumping and bar brawls!)
That being said, we also got more than our fair share of hook-ups, fist pumping and bar brawls! Before I go too far, here’s the episode:
This episode should have been called “Grenade Revisited” as the Jersey Shore‘s favorite buzzkill made her encore appearance at the house and brought her dark cloud of misery and absolutely no sex with her. But her dark cloud wasn’t just the effect of her Debbie Downerness and contagious moodiness like last time, this time she brought actual re-enforcements in the form of “hippo” – or to use a term from the Jersey Shore dictionary, “Grenade Muscle.” The problem arose because there was a third girl that The Situation actually thought was attractive (I believe she would be called the “Grenade pin”)
Pauly seemed unwilling to fall on such an explosive grenade so Mike sends Snooki out to do the dirty work and ask the Grenade and the Muscle to leave, but the girls went around back and had started talking to the guys. (In case you haven’t been following the lingo, this means Mike has “pulled the pin”) Snooki comes around and is still on a mission so she just straight up tells the two girls, “You are going to have to leave.” What happened next? You guessed it…
There was all kinds of screaming and slapping and at one point MTV graciously blurred out what we can only assume was a hippo nip slip, or as they call it on the boardwalk, a “hippo nippo.” Snooki got slapped in the face – the same face that received the infamous Snooki punch two nights earlier.
Grenade muscle wrestling exposes a “hippo nippo” (censored by MTV)
Later in the episode some Jersey local is ragging Pauly at a bar about the fact that he was from New York and later the same dude heckles Ronnie and Sammi as they’re walking home. Ronnie tries to take the high road and ignore the dude for the most part, but Sammi starts in on the guy and his girlfriend which elevated the shouting match to the level of “It’s on!” Ronnie tried to stop Sammi and even pushed her at one point because he didn’t want to take time out of his night to beat up some local, but it was too late.
The local dude looked like he might be a tough guy, and I assumed he must be if he was heckling some juiced up guy like Ronnie, but when it hit the fan the guy fought like a drunk John Candy, but not in a good way. In the beginning he was actually using his girlfriend as a shield, trying to punch Ronnie around her. (To her credit, she seemed to fight better than he did, kinda like a drunk Dan Akroyd) And to Ronnie’s credit, he definitely won the match in a unanimous decision after taking the guy down and punching his local noggin repeatedly.
I think my favorite part of that whole scene is when Pauly’s friend Kaylee calls the house and Mike is talking to some random girl on the duck phone (he had been calling girls all night trying to get them to come out to the bar). As he’s laying on the bean bag he hears the beep that tells him he has a call on the other line and he says, “hold on one second there’s somebody else trying to call.” Kaylee says that Ronnie was in a bad fight down on the boardwalk. Mike repeats what she said aloud and adds a question mark, “Ronnie just got into a bad fight on the boardwalk?” Pauly hears it and immediately grabs his shoes and is ready to bolt to help out his buddy. My favorite part is that there is a brief moment as Mike is repeating what she said and immediately afterward where it seems obvious that if it were just him he woulda kept on laying there on the beanbag, asked a few more questions, and then got back to phone creeping. Say what you will about The Situation, but that dude has his priorities and he sticks by ’em!
On a side note, is there any doubt who the sexiest character on this show is?
That’s right! Duck Phone! When is that hunk of fowl sexiness gonna get its own show?!? Get on it MTV!
And here’s a couple bonus clips. The first features a visit from J-Woww’s boyfriend and best friend Denise, who Pauly unabashedly says this about: “Denise, I don’t know. She looks just like J-Woww – like, nice body and everything but she looked like she’d been around the block and back.” The Situation wasn’t of the same opinion and he goes after her. Denise seems on the ball as she’s able to sum up The Situation immediately saying, “He has no shame.”
This next clip features an interview with Sammi, Ronnie and J-Woww focusing on the events from episode 6:
WATCH EPISODE 5 “Just Another Day at the Shore” HERE
Hurry up next Thursday!
Live in or around Philadelphia? Go check out DJ Pauly D! Here’s a personal message from Pauly: