Husband sends wife spreadsheet of all her reasons for turning down sex

Redditor throwwwwaway29 might not have the most sensitive husband in the world.

While her husband was heading out of town on business, she received the above spreadsheet from him. It details every time he attempted to initiate sexual congress with her over the past month, along with the result.

You’ll notice that, in truly seductive fashion, the husband also noted the reason his wife gave for not having sex. Because isn’t having your words thrown back in your face always a huge turn on?

According to the wife:

Yesterday morning, while in a taxi on the way to the airport, Husband sends a message to my work email which is connected to my phone. He’s never done this, we always communicate in person or by text. I open it up, and it’s a sarcastic diatribe basically saying he won’t miss me for the 10 days I’m gone. Attached is a SPREADSHEET of all the times he has tried to initiate sex since June 1st, with a column for my “excuses”, using verbatim quotes of why I didn’t feel like having sex at that very moment. According to his ‘document’, we’ve only had sex 3 times in the last 7 weeks, out of 27 “attempts” on his part.

Budding Lotharios, take note: this is a pristine example of how not to seduce someone. Never has the old maxim “If at first you don’t succeed, try having a conversation with your partner” been more appropriate.

(Possibly the best detail? The otherwise overly-meticulous husband failed to widen the C column enough to accommodate every excuse.)

Fortunately, it looked like calmer heads did prevail, as evidenced by the most popular of the over two-hundred responses:

For the sake of your sanity in dealing with clients for nine days, reply back with an email. But a nice one. Even if his email was pretty lame, he is probably fearing that the past 7 weeks are not only temporary but a new way of things.

Tell him you love him, things have been crazy with all of the stuff going on, but you will work it out. And for your sake, even though you guys have a lot of stuff going on, you have to enjoy life. Make evenings together “your thing”. Make dinner after the gym but leave him the dishes while you go and take a nice shower, get into something comfortable and just relax and enjoy your night together. Watch TV, have sex, snuggle. Married life gets busy. When my kids were little my grandmother told me that housework will always wait for you. I always spent evenings with my kids making dinner, giving them a bath, reading to them etc. Your evenings together are as important as anything else in life, maybe more so. Cut yourself some slack, and him too. Hope it works out.

What do you think? What’s the right way to go about pointing out a sexual deficiency? How would you respond in this situation?

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