Why are folks missing their calls? They’re playing “Ow My Balls!”

As if YouTube wasn’t bad enough for America’s Funniest Home Videos along comes the next generation of baby-maker-bustin’ hilarity Ow My Balls!  If you noticed folks hunkered over their I-Phone at Starbucks with tears rolling down their cheeks completely engrossed and ignorant of what is transpiring around them then you have probably witnessed the cultural effect of the I-Phone app game Ow My Balls!

What is your goal in this game?  Well it’s to sack-attack our poor adventurer as many times as possible in an endless stream of nut-thumpers and dangling-participle-pounders.  Yes, I know, that is the most awesome sounding idea of all time.  Check out this video review of the game to get a little glimpse of Ow My Balls! in sacktion:

There are bad days then there is our poor hero being lead through Ow My Balls!  What was the inspiration for this masterapp?  According to the developer Josh Michaels it was Mike Judge’s (Office Space the Movie, King of the Hill) film Idocracy which features a dumbed down future in which a man sits for hours watching the TV show called, well, Ow My Balls!  Here’s the clip from the film:

In another stroke of jingleberry-jousting-genious you are rewarded for outstanding play by receiving YouTube montage videos of bird’s-egg-blasting hilarity.  What was that you want to check out a YouTube video of family-jewel-jabbing nonsense.  You got it:

I apologize in advance for the hours you’re going to waste doing your own mountain-oyster-owning.  Go ahead and download the app here.