MUG SHOT Jersey man threatens neighbor with gun over flatulence

If you’re strolling the streets of Teaneck, New Jersey do not send an air biscuit in the general direction of 72-year-old Daniel Collins Jr.. Dude might just pull his pistol on your offending backside!

According to authorities Daniel was chilling inside his apartment when he claims to have heard a turtle-head-burp emanating from an unnamed 47-year-old neighbor. Collins Jr. took the colon cologne as an insult and decided to confront the alleged gas passer in the vestibule of their apartment building.

Armed with a .32 caliber silver revolver, Collins Jr. threatened the neighbor who he believed had unleashed a Missouri mud duck and told him, “I’m going to put a hole in your head.” The neighbor called the cops who found a gun matching the description in the passenger seat of Collins’ ride.

Collins was charged with aggravated assault, unlawful possession of a firearm, possession of a weapon for an unlawful purpose and terroristic threats. He was released on his own recognizance. Apparently the not-so-friendly neighbors had an ongoing dispute stemming from noise complaints. Kind of like Grumpy Old Men but with guns and taco torpedoes.

No charges were filed against the neighbor. I suppose there was no physical evidence of his purported sphincter whistle.