Things were going pretty well for Kimberly Menzies and Usman “Sojaboy” Umar during her first trip to Nigeria. Usman even greeted Kimberly with a kiss, which meant a lot for her because he previously withheld physical affection. Things took a sharp turn, however, when they discussed the notion of taking on more than one wife. Kimberly had an understanding of the situation that she would receive all the love, and Usman would keep another woman in Nigeria just to have children with.
Not only does this sound like an inhumane situation for the second wife, but it seems like Kimberly had misunderstood Usman’s intentions about polygamy. Kimberly doesn’t want to interact with a potential second wife at all, but Usman wants her to befriend his future wives and potentially live with them.
In an attempt to help Kimberly understand, Usman invited his polygamous friend Kabiru to speak with her. “She loves me hard, hard,” Usman says. “And I love her too. And in future we should get married.” He went on to say that he told Kimberly that he wanted to have children in the future because it’s such an important part of African culture, and she was okay with him taking another wife because she’s over childbearing age.
Still, Kimberly’s terrified of the idea of Usman having another wife.
“You don’t have to be afraid of anything,” Kabiru reassured her.
Kimberly got angry, though, when Kabiru suggested that wives should be treated the same. He even said that if a man has a favorite wife, he should conceal his favoritism because there will be “consequences” if one wife is treated better.
Kimberly claimed that Usman told her that she would get all the love because she is the first wife. She claims that Usman has told her numerous times that the role of the second wife is just to have children.
She went so far as to say that she would never have come to Nigeria and pursued this relationship with Usman if he had told her that all wives must be equal.
Then, Usman dropped the bomb on her that he might have up to five wives including Kimberly. He explained that having more wives would make it easier to have 10 children really quickly, and then he could stop having children.
Kimberly says that she doesn’t ever want to meet the second wife or the kids if Usman has them with another woman. Kabiru tried to explain that it would be better for the wives to be friends, and that maybe Usman could bring a child to Kimberly to raise in the United States.
“What the f**k?” Kimberly asked Usman. She then got so heated that she flipped over a milky drink all over Usman and stormed off.