The Real Housewives of New Jersey‘s Danielle Staub was planning to marry her maybe-not-a-Duke fiance Oliver Maier on Monday, just one week after he proposed while the two were on vacation together in St. Barth. Those wedding plans were later derailed because Danielle’s daughters “pushed back” against the quickie marriage. After it was announced that the wedding was postponed, US Weekly cited multiple sources as they announced Danielle and Oliver had broken up completely!
Danielle responded to US Weekly with a video of herself and Oliver posted on her Instagram story in which she addressed the “rumors that we are not together.” Here is the clip:
“Here I am with my love,” she says, before turning to Oliver. “And…”
Oliver, who looks like he has been held captive and water boarded by ISIS, mumbles: “I love you.”
Danielle peers back at the camera. “There you go!” she says as she smiles.
Needless to say, the video didn’t really send the intended message of presenting a couple caught up in the giddy early stages of a whirlwind romance. Instead, it seemed to show a man caught up in a destructive tornado romance! Oliver reminded me of a cross between Jason Statham and the guy who plays Mayhem in those Allstate insurance commercials. Of course, he did just almost drown while trying to swim “blackout” drunk in the Caribbean Sea. That might actually be a better description of him in the video, now that I think about it.
In case you missed it, Danielle shocked everyone when she announced last Monday that she was engaged for the 21st time just one week after her acrimonious divorce from Marty Caffrey was finalized. And remember, that wedding was just ten months ago!
Danielle and Oliver were vacationing in St. Barth, and they reportedly celebrated their engagement by drinking an excessive amount of alcohol. According to a witness, Oliver decided to go for a swim in the sea while extremely intoxicated, and had to be rescued. TMZ shared video of him being helped on the shoreline, unable to stand up as a huge wave knocked him over.
The two were planning to make it official by getting married in front of a justice of the peace in New York City on Monday. Over the weekend, Oliver took Danielle engagement ring shopping at Van Cleef & Arpels, where she picked out a 5-carat ruby ring. Later that day, she revealed to a TMZ photographer that the wedding might not happen on Monday because her daughters were “pushing back.”
It was later reported by US Weekly that the wedding was off indefinitely because Danielle and Oliver had called it quits. Oh, and in the middle of all this, Page Six shared a story revealing that Oliver isn’t really the Duke of Provence because “Provence was inherited by King Louis XI of France in 1481 and subsequently became part of the French royal domain.”
Am I the only one sort of wishing Danielle had her own spin-off and all of this was caught on film by Bravo? Or better yet, perhaps it will all be turned into a Disney animated film! Maybe The Duchess and the Frog?
I will send you all off with the tweets of Danielle’s beloved RHONJ co-star Margaret Josephs, who offered up her thoughts on #Danielliver over the past week:
She might be a Duchess but she’s still not a Housewife, you can’t sleep your way into that job #truth ????? https://t.co/gZSp0FW1Av
— Margaret Josephs (@MargaretJosephs) March 1, 2019
Pej, people asked me to respond to her engagement and it’s quite obvious this is a publicity stunt, and so was her tv wedding. She speaks of myself constantly on her instagram to fans. We, as a collective had an amazing season. Not one person makes a show #truth
— Margaret Josephs (@MargaretJosephs) March 2, 2019
Asa Hawks is a writer and editor for Starcasm. You can contact Asa via Twitter, Facebook, or email at starcasmtips(at)yahoo.com
