90 Day Fiance: Are Kirlyam Ailly and Alan still together?


90 Day Fiance‘s Kirlyam Ailly, from a small town in Brazil with no running water, met L.A. based Mormon Alan while he was on a missionary trip in her country. At the time of filming TLC’s 90 Day Fiance, they had been engaged for a year and had maybe spent a total of two weeks together.

When Kirlyam arrives in the U.S. Alan takes her to the Hollywood Walk of Fame where she excitedly poses with the stars of Marilyn Monroe, and her personal crush, Johnny Depp. Things get dicey when she spots a Jack Sparrow impersonator: Alan realizes that he’s jealous and doesn’t want the performer to hug Kirlyam. A hand kiss is allowed, which excites Kirlyam too much in Alan’s opinion. In fact, even Alan can barely touch Kirlyam. Because of his Mormon values, Alan is waiting until marriage to have sex. To make sure they live up to their values, he has a friend come over to chaperone the couple at home. It’s definitely a clash of cultures, probably in many ways. Can two people really, truly know each other through Skype and emails?

There is no evidence of whether or not Alan and Kirlyam worked out and got married, but in August a friend set up a Crowd Tilt account to raise money to help Kirlyam’s family before she came over to the US. Her father, the sole breadwinner for the family, was hit by a bus while on his motorcycle earlier this year. He survived and recovered, but was unable to work while medical bills mounted. They met their Crowd Tilt goal of $500 after about a month, and it’s unclear from the description if the money was solely to get Kirlyam to the US on her 90 day visa, to help her family pay medical and other bills, or both.

CLICK HERE to learn more about the other couples from 90 Day Fiance.

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  • jeff

    ‘There is no evidence of whether or not Alan and Kirlyam worked out and got married,’

    So you made an artical that was unable to answer the very question you posed. Slow Saturday?

    • frontdoormom

      My thoughts exactly…smh. i just refuse to click on some articles because of their titles. Waste of time.

  • TMel

    Okay!! I mean what was the point of this article It didn’t even elude to an answer just a flat out here’s a question you wanna hear the answer to…….well we found nothing Okay! WTH

  • Lanie_Lane

    JMO, but if my fiancé was jealous because I hugged a Jack Sparrow impersonator I’d run like Forrest Gump. That, my friends, is a HUGE red flag.

    • Erica

      my exact thought!

  • anjealka

    I am still very confused about this story & have asked countless neighbors(I live in Utah) about it. How could he meet her on his mission?? Men leave at 18 and the max age is 23(this is correct ages, I have asked bishop the ages changed 3 years ago). He is 29 and she is 21 so was he 20 and she was 12 when they met and he waited years to get her? Did he convert her family years ago and then return for her?
    Many missionaries marry girls they met on mission but these are 18-21 year old guys marrying 18-21 year old women. Something doesn’t add up.

    • frontdoormom

      Hes a pervert. Plain and simple. Or like Dj on rosanne once said…a pre-vert.

      • anjealka

        The only explantion (if he really met her on his mission) is he converted her family to Mormonism and then he went back to America, didn’t find a wife in the next 8 years so he remembers the family and goes back to see how the little girls grew up. Yes sick or weird for sure. The Mormon church has had a big push for marriage by 25, new single churches, activites, speed dating, websites, if he is a good church going Mormon he should have been able to find a women in the US. Something is wrong.

        • Sarah

          I am “a good church going Mormon” and I didn’t get married till I was 26 and I am a female as well. Nothing was wrong… I just wanted to travel and focus on my education first. And no, there was ZERO “push” to get married by a certain age.

          • anjealka

            My husband is a returned missionary & he got married at 28. His cousin who is a double PHD got married (also a returned missionary at 37. We were both surprised when 3 years ago they started new singles wards and were knocking on every members door that was over 25 & not married & following up with them about marriage & church. When the mission age changed to 18, and the singles ward push went from 30 to 25, I have seen such a huge dynamic change. In fact the double PHD got dropped to part time at our local college because admissions fell due to missions and marriage. My point was if Alan wanted to get married, there should be no lack of choices these days in his backyard. There is no need to travel back to South America. If someone wants to wait no problems here. I’m so glad my husband waited, he had a degree, a house, had all his fun years out of his system and is an excellent husband and father.

            • Sarah

              I see your point about how if he wasn’t able to find someone here and had to look out of the country there is something fishy. Plus it is always suspicious when a missionary meets his wife while on his mission since that goes against every mission rule there is!

              • anjealka

                I was surprised when Elizabeth Smart was so public about meeting someone on her mission since it is not the best image for the church. I have seen some very successful marriages and some not from this happening. I have one neighbor who has a son that is now in a horrible divorce & his wife took the kids back to central America. My daughter has a friend whose my reminds me a lot of Kiryln. She was 18 when she came here to marry her missionary. He is a balding nerdy controlling man. She loves her kids(and they are great kids) but he treats her like a baby machine and maid. It is sad. On the plus side I have several neighbors that have very happy equal marriages from missions but overall it should not be allowed because the focus is the gospel not dating or love.

            • Meredith

              Did you really just say that your husband had all of his fun years out of his system. What in the world is wrong with your self esteem? Do you not consider yourself fun and a life with your children fun?

              • Kay

                I don’t think she meant it like that, but you do make a good point.

            • Meara Feely Harrington

              Knocking on their doors and asking them about marriage and children? That’s a little creepy. Creepier than the cold calls. My church doesn’t push anyone to get married. Rather, single adults may be called to be celibate laity.

    • Sarah

      Nope. Men can leave while they are 25. So if he left when he was almost 26 he would have been gone for 2 years, come home at 27 almost 28 and they have been engaged for a year. So yes it does add up.

      • anjealka

        Are you sure, do you have a source? I have asked 3 bishops who say 23 is the cap now, & it started when the prophet said at general conference that the age was dropping to 18 for men and 19 for women. In fact my husbands best friend is a bishop and I asked him a lot of questions concerning the ages. He said that 18-19 is the norm but over 21, he has a long talk and the young man has to have special reasons(maybe an illness, family reason) that gets them approved. He said the concerns are(Alan would be an example of this), they really do not want over 21, who have been in long term relationships going into the mission field because it has lead to issues in the past(either leaving missions, acting on feelings while on a mission, being distracted from mission work by local women or a girlfriend at home).

        • me

          Sarah is right. I had a friend leave at 25. He didn’t have any health conditions that I was aware of. The change in age requirements happened in General Conference October of 2012 so it’s pretty new.

          • anjealka

            When did your friend leave at 25? I remember plenty of people leaving after college so age 22-23 back in the 90’s and early 2000’s but none recently. Certatinly according to my husband’s friend who has been a bishop for almost 4 years, he said the oldest he has sent out is 21 and that was due to illness.

        • Jenny

          Why is it such a big deal? So much that you’re asking Bishops and neighbors and sources and people online about a guy on a TV show? That’s a little obsessive. I cannot imagine going to church and asking about someone I saw on TV. Or asking all the neighbors.

          • Kay

            I think it’s called curiosity.

    • Alicia

      Hi there, I actually worked with Alan while going to school in Rexburg (lot thinner then and more hair). He is a really nice guy. He met the family in Brazil and stayed close to them and in contact with them after he came home. He had no interest in her then or when she was a teenager. Things only changed after she got older (as in not a teenager). There was never a shortage of girls for Alan… I’m actually really surprised that he signed up to do the show because it’s not like him, but more power to him if he’s comfortable with it! They are married and really happy, and that’s what counts 🙂

      • mrs j

        Thank you for the positive comment!! I am happy for them!

      • Nomar

        Yeah.. except he said he was in love with her ever since the first time he saw her. His words not mine. He first saw her when she was a pre-teen.

      • Jodi

        He is a creep and he only married her to control her period

      • anjealka

        Sorry I never saw this response sooner. I appreciate your insight which makes sense given his age. Living in Southern Utah I have seen many young men go back and marry young women from where they served their mission, all stories are a bit different so I totally again appreciate your comments that clarify the timeframe. TLC is known for its editing.

  • Smh

    This show is so fake, like the rest of “reality” TV. Funny how he was so worried about someone seeing all her beauty & they might want her to model or something. Previews for later show her what? Modeling! Smh.

  • me

    Found a twitter account for her where she writes mostly in portuguese, and she refers to him as her husband.

  • anjealka

    Is Alan last name public? All the women’s last name are but I haven’t seen Alan’s name? After all this talk my husband just checked his mission website. Since we know what mission he served in , if we had a last name, it would be easy to find out what year.

    • Guest

      Alan Cox.

      • Guest

        Also his Facebook (under Al Xoc) says he graduated BYU Idaho in 2009.

        • trufy

          His facebook is Oxc Al now

    • unpersuaded

      His LinkedIn profile has him in college from 2006-09 and then at his current job since June 2010.

  • JustinLove Aka CND online

    Kirlyam has such a good personality & is absolutely gorgeous! This idiot completely used sneaky tactics and whatever nonsense he could to get over on her family,Kirlyam being so young,naive and inexperienced to the world was completely tricked or dooped into this relationship by this guy,she def deserved much better,I feel so bad for her. This guy is so ignorant ,awkward & undeserving of Kirlyam. I hope she knows that she can leave and make it anywhere in this world without that 99cent sandal wearing deuche. She’s walked herself into a prison and sentenced herself to life only the warden keeps unlocking the cell and explaining to her that shes in the wrong place but too scared to just open the cell door and leave. It’s like she’s only ever had grey to paint with and never knew that all the colors of the rainbow were always available for her.

    • LME


    • therealdeal

      I thought the same since the beginning of the show. Sad thing is, Kirlyam actually seems to be with him for all the right reasons… He doesn’t though. I am pretty sure all he saw in her was a gorgeous girl he could easily have control over… Let’s be honest, a girl as beautiful, fun and witty as her would NEVER be with someone like him if she was raised in a different setting

    • Manu

      The only reason he rushed the marriage was so that he can have complete control over her right away, have sex with her and get her pregnant, so that she’s stuck with him. She is so gorgeous. She could have a great career as a model. And he is totally trying to talk it out of her, wtf!! My husband would be proud if I would have such an awesome opportunity. She deserves much better!

      • Jodi


    • Jodi

      Thank you! Thank you! And Thank you! Thank you for being as honest as I have been about this creep! I pray that she divorces him as soon as she can! Run!!

  • Viviane Miranda

    Yes, they got married. She has some other Brazilian friends on facebook that also got married to Mormons. In one of the comments they say her wedding will be shown on TLC. They also talk about places they have been to in CA. I just don’t get why they (tlc) insists on saying that they have no running water in her city in Brazil. She does not live in the city. She might be from a very poor area close to the city. Please google Goiania and look up the pictures! It is a huge city!!! Please understand Brazil is a huge country and they do have running HOT water!!! They started dating quite some time ago because he applied for her visa in Aug 2012. So I guess he met her in 2011 or in the beginning of 2012 when she was 18.(?) The truth is this girl is from a very poor area in Brazil and she (and her family) decided it would be better for her to marry this guy and come to America to get a better life or herself and her family.

  • Viviane Miranda

    Another part of the article talks about how her dad had hospital bills to pay. This is probably another lie because there is free public health care in Brazil! The government pays for it. So if they decided to go to a private doctor it was because they ad the money to pay for it. No doctor in Brazil treats you and then sends you the bill. You have to pay first then you will be treated(private hospitals). I know that because I’m from Brazil.

    • Lilly

      ou are right Viviane…My first thought was that there was no relevance of that information in the articles I read, except to be condescending. There are people (Americans) currently living in America, who are living without running water..(for whatever the reason/s) What is the big deal??? Every society “started” at some “starting point”. If it “is not” it ” once was”

      • Lilly

        You are right Viviane…My first thought was that there was no relevance of that information in the articles I read, except to be condescending. There are people (Americans) currently living in America, who are living without running water..(for whatever the reason/s) What is the big deal??? Every society “started” at some “starting point”. If it “is not” it ” once was”

  • Io_oe

    He didn’t say he met her while on his mission. A lot of people go back after they are done with their mission just to visit and to tour the place. He might have met her while he was visiting afet his mission.

    • Lilly

      However he met her is now in the past. They are now married and should be offered well wishes and given the chance to grow and thrive with each other as a couple. People please spare them the negativity…send some positive thoughts their way. That’s what we all would desire.

  • Engineered Reality

    I think whoever wrote this was really asking the question because they don’t know the answer either. Why ask the readers? News writers are supposed to be the ones doing the reporting.

    I sometime ask myself whether or not I’d be willing to find me a bride from another country. How would my friends look at that?

    • Lilly

      Ten words could be the answer. People are people, and love is love. Your call. Period.

    • Catherine

      Why would you care about what your friends think about your decision? They will marry and have their own family and youll be a sad lonely person if you care too much about what they think

  • nellydesign

    I’ll definitely say that Alan needs to loosen up a LOT. I’m not talking about his standards but his attitude toward the woman he professes to love and want to marry. If she wants to hug someone, he should let her hug him. If she wants to start modelling, he should let her. If these things change her somehow or pull her away from him then that’s the way it was meant to be and he should deal with it instead of being a child. His obsessive possessive attitude toward her tells me this is doomed. She will leave him to find someone who doesn’t try to force her affection or devotion. Trust isn’t evident in the relationship and THAT’S the red flag. He also got into this without any plan for her living arrangements other than him and his friend sleeping in the living room for 3 months? Really? Find her a place. Geez. Doomed.

    As for the other two, the bald guy is getting played. The girl wants nothing to do with him and it is completely transparent to everyone but him. She is here because she wanted to come to the states. And the foreign language learning site is obviously a front for Russian women to find American men to help them come to America.

    The last two have the best chance but the Mom needs to drop her superiority complex and condescension. And they should probably figure out what they’re going to do when he leaves for 6 months to work on an oil rig. I’m guessing she’s not going to do well all alone. She would have been better off living in Columbia and him staying there with her during his time off the rig.

    • BH

      The Russian girl acts like she anorexia which can be a very serious eating disorder. The bald guy needs to know all about this. The fact she was jealous just because 2 girls were talking to him while he waited for her shows a lot of mistrust in the relationship and her insecurity. Big red flags on both. Now the Colombian girl only really cares about getting what she wants, its not her money, she doesn’t have to earn it. He should run now before she drains him dry and gets tired of giving. Sex is how she keeps him staying, the oldest trick in the book. He should wake up before its too late. The Filipino girl should run back home, too.This guy has too much baggage!

      • BenFranklin

        I agree with this, I think the Colombian is the most experienced and knows how to manipulate to get her way. I think she’s going to spend the gay dude into the poor house and party way too much for him.

  • Kelly

    No HOT water. Not no water at all. Did you watch the show??? She is doing dishes in her family’s’ home with…water! lol

    Anyway….he is a creepy pervert. No American woman would want him. He wants a daughter/wife.

    • Ruth Mundy

      She should run back to Brazil. He is a controling, creepy freak. He will control her in all things. He makes me sick.

  • Oceanhexe

    Uhm, I noticed that Kirlyam is from Goiania which is actually a big city (a friend of mine lived there). Here is what Wikipedia says: “Goiânia is the capital and largest city of the Brazilian state of
    Goiás. With a population of 1,301,892, it is the second-largest city in
    the Central-Western Region and the 13th-largest in the country.” Not exactly a tiny jungle village in the Amazon forest….Hmmmm, no running water? I highly doubt it, especially since they have SKYPE haha.

    • BH

      I’m sure if they had primitive living conditions it’s prob true. When visited Mexico City there on the outskirts were people living in grass huts, no in door anything. The beds were hammocks inside. Yet, there are huge gated homes up on the hills on the outskirt of Mexico City, too. To see this diversity in one city was astounding.
      Alan said he fell in love with Kirlyam when she opened the door when he was proselyting on his mission he thought she was so beautiful. Hope they both stay happily married. Marriage is hard enough without cultural and age differences, too.

      • Lilly

        There is absolutely no country on the face of the earth where there are all elites. So I think people who try as hard as they do to squeeze in the information on the living conditions of this young lady’s family, do so to “try” to crush her. Many elites of today, and/or their preceeding generations, were raised in less grandeur than are perceived. A person’s character should be enough premise on which to judge them. I wish the newly weds well, despite their ‘shortcomings’, (which no one is without). Kirlyam is a beautiful young lady.

  • Lil Pontoon

    You guys have to listen to O&A commentary on this show. It is hilarious.

  • Run Kirlyam! Run fast!

    Alan is such a creepy loser. She’s too good for him, she just doesn’t realize it yet because she lived such a sheltered life. The reason he rushed things is because he knows it. Everyone knows it (even the mom asked her what she sees in him). So he traps her. He only let her entertain the modeling career for the show otherwise he was steaming inside. I guarantee he won’t let her model anymore. Her young life is over now. Any potential career is over. What a waste. I hope she gets her citizenship and runs before she procreates with that nerd and he traps her with him forever. He just grosses me out. I really, really don’t know how she can touch him. So gross. If I had her looks and personality, I would do so much with it! I wouldn’t waste it on some balding man who drives an old car and is psycho jealous. Please Kirlyam, run! Run like the wind!

    • faith

      I said the exact same thing! This guy is way too murderey for me! he hides his control freakiness, his jealousy behind his supposedly calm ,demure demeanor,but ,trust me, he is a source to be reckoned with. Divorce?????? He would rather have her dead than to let her go. He is going to get her pregnant ASAP because that will mean complete control over her and the baby,and her life. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That poor poor child!

  • Treelea

    That guy reminds me of a molester. She looks so young and acts childlike. I feel like issuing an amber alert on her. Creepy dude

  • Guest2014

    Gotta say…I’m a little disappointed (won’t reveal why since all may not have seen the finale yet). Enjoy!

  • Ericka Y

    hes creepy!!!

    • beebetree

      Yes, extremely..i hate that 30 yr old man deflowered some that looks like she could be his daughter. Poor kirlyam doesn’t know. Smh.

  • nptexas

    He is insecure, controlling, and just plain weird. He’s supposed to be a grown man, not a high school boy.

  • Hayley Rose

    Yes they are still together and married.

  • Fabiolla Cristina

    Parei nesse casal! Eles são uns fofos, torço por eles! Vida linda pra vocês!

  • Daisy

    “Kirlyam Ailly, from a small town in Brazil with no running water”…. kkkkkkk Goiânia is a big city…