If you’re an It’s Gary Timer then you know the portly bearded Teen Mom star has quite the bromance going with best bud Evan Parker. Earlier today Gary decided to take their HElationship to a whole new level by recording a song expressing his love for Evan and sharing it on Facebook!
Here’s Gary’s heartfelt intro, followed by a photo of Gary and Evan together, and then the lyrics:
Yo! This is me, my guitar, and I’m going to sing a song for you, Evan, my heart, because you’ve never left me by my side. I’m singing a song because you’re my number one, you know? And I should be your number one. I feel like without you I’m nothing. I feel like you’re my all. You’ve been such a great friend, been such a good person, and you’ve been a great lover, and I want the world to know. I’m gonna sing, from my heart to you. [crying] Ok?
You’re my best buddy
been here for a year and a half
When we met
you carried my jacket for two hours
Then we met
you changed my life forever
You’re my buddy
I’m your friend
I love you to the end
And I want you to know
I’m not letting go
Claire thinks she can have you
but guess what?
I’ma grab you
You can say
I won’t let you go
Evan you’re my love
and I want it to grow
Don’t say goodbye to me
because I love thee
I will not say good-bye to you
But I hate your f***ing car it’s so damn small
It’s the size of a peanut with wheels
It’s like a crayon stuck on Cheerios
I hate the son of a gun it’s too small
I’m never riding in it again
It can be your focus
but I’ll be your king
I love you Evan
This is my heart melody
Evan, don’t ever leave me
As a tribute to Gary’s love for Evan we put our best Photoshop artists to work on a visual masterpiece that we hope measures up to the audio artistry of Gary’s bro ode:
(Can you say Clairey Shirley?)
In the end there’s only one way to sum up the kind of love Gary Shirley has for his bff…
Boodipbopbopbooger.
Asa Hawks is a writer and editor for Starcasm.
