RHONJ Teresa and Joe Giudice split after more than 20 years together

A Teresa and Joe Giudice split has seemed all but inevitable for the better part of a year, so it shouldn’t come as a galloping shock to learn that the two are done. Nonetheless, it was still a bit surprising to hear that the Real Housewives of New Jersey star decided to make the split from her recently deported husband tabloid-official so close to the holidays. Teresa has yet to actually file for divorce from Joe, but it seems the literal distance between the two of them — Joe remains in Italy, where he was sent earlier this year; before that, he was in an ICE detention center for over five months — was too much for Teresa to get past

E! was the first outlet to confirm the Teresa and Joe Giudice split, saying only that the network “can confirm” the separation is real. (The two must not have had as “amazing” an Italian visit over Thanksgiving as Teresa claimed.) And it looks like Teresa is holding back on making the split legal out of concern for her and Joe’s four daughters. Teresa “doesn’t want to crush” Gia, 18; Gabriella, 15; Milania, 14; and Audriana, 10, “even more with news of a divorce,” a source previously told the network. For now, Teresa’s focus remains on “being an amazing mom to” her daughters.

Not long after E! broke the story, People got a little more detail from an anonymous source allegedly close to the couple. Per their article, the split was amicable; in fact, it sounds like both parties had already moved on and were just waiting to let each other know.

“They discussed their future when Teresa and the girls went to Italy in early November and they agreed that each had to move on. They are doing so amicably and very slowly,” the source says. “Joe has been out on a few dates, Teresa has not. She has been too busy with the girls, with work obligations and taking care of her father. She is happy for Joe . They have been very friendly with one another and are very supportive of each other’s happiness. They still love one another, but as Teresa told Andy Cohen on the WWHL special, they are separated by the Atlantic Ocean. Neither is interested in a long distance relationship.”

…The source says the girls will be visiting Joe for Christmas in Italy, while Teresa is staying home in New Jersey with her father.

I know you can’t really force the timing of something like this. When a relationship isn’t working, it’s probably always best to end it as quickly and frankly as possible. Still, I have to wonder about Teresa and Joe’s girls, getting hit with this news during the holidays and with their father an entire ocean away. It would be a lot for four full-grown adults to process, let alone three teenagers and a ten-year old. There wasn’t really an easy way for any of this to come out.

Then again, maybe the girls have already made their peace with the Teresa and Joe Giudice split. Their parents certainly seemed ready for a fresh start when they filmed their sometimes-cringeworthy, often-fascinating Watch What Happens Live episode a couple of months ago. When you’ve got to teleconference in for what in retrospect was a pre-separation postmortem, you know the writing’s already on the wall.

(Photo credit: Teresa and Joe Giudice split via Bravo)

John Sharp is Starcasm’s chief editorial correspondent-at-large. Tips: E-mail john@starcasm.net or Twitter @john_starcasm.