You can take the boys out of Jersey but you can’t take the Jersey out of the boys! The streets of Florence Italy were transformed into a WWE ring as Jersey Shore stud muffins Paul “Pauly D” DelVecchio and Vinny Guadagnino incited a drunken two-man riot while Ronnie watched and laughed.
Don’t worry though, Pauly and Vinny were just horsing around for fun. It was all part of an amazing night that included dinner, partying, lots of girls, and mannequin rage. The result is a series of pictures that look like the closing credits from The Hangover 3! Here’s how the evening broke down:
The Jersey Shore cast enjoy a late dinner at 12:30 before heading off together to attend a party at the Astor Bar. On the way to the party Ronnie appears jubilant and at one point is overheard saying, “This is the best day of my life!”
During the party Vinny gets a little wild and mighty intimate with a good-timin’ gal. (You might need to consult your Jersey Shore dictionary here.)
After deflowering his new gal pal at the bar, Vinny did the same to a vendor on the street! (Literally) Ah, but we all know what a good-hearted guy Vinny is so of course he soon returned and offered to pay for the flowers he stole, which he then handed out to girls, bike riders and even a dude walking by. The moment was captured in what could easily be considered the homosexualest Jersey Shore photo ever. (NOH8!)
Before all the flowers were gone, Vinny took a moment to strike a Rocky-inspired pose atop a large ball:
As you probably know no Guido can hand flowers out to dudes and then jump up on some balls without getting his a$$ kicked! Which leads us to the street brawl in which Vinny and Pauly D playfully re-enact the Peter Griffin vs. Chicken fight from Family Guy with a series of tackles, chases and punches. Here’s the take-down:
And just like guys seeing two hot girls kissing, the ladies of Florence didn’t stand a chance in the face of such masculine machismo! As a result the boys ratio-ed up nicely with three lovely ladies that seemed ready to participate in some deflowering, jumping up on balls and wrestling of their own! (I have no idea if they “seemed ready” for that – otherwise known as DTF – I just wanted to reuse all those innuendos again!)
But, just in case their Seaside Heights mating dance hadn’t completely worked its magic yet, the boys stopped off at a clothing store just prior to getting home and yelled “What you looking at?” at the child mannequins in the window. (Seriously.)
(If Pauly had taken that mannequin home and wound up smooshing, would that be considered statue-tory rape? Hi-ooooooooo!!)
Amazingly the crew was home by 2:30am.
And in case you were wondering about The Situation, don’t worry – he had the ratio working for him as well as he brought home another pair of young ladies that seemed ready to assemble a Situation sandwich!
Wait a minute! Is that Vienna Girardi from The Bachelor?!? What the hell is she doing there?
There’s a brilliant idea! MTV could feature Mike Sorrentino in their own less dignified version of ABC’s The Bachelor and call it The Sitchelor! I guess they could do one with Snooki or JWoww too – call it The Bitchelorette. (My application to be on JWoww’s season would be the first one in!)
Damn Florence looks like fun! Perhaps all those college-aged tourists are really on to something!
Photos: Mario & Luigi / WENN.com