Decapitated head of patron saint of genital diseases for sale

There is news of the weird and then there is news of the pbftfftfftftfft!  This little gem from Ireland where President Obama is currently hunting down his lost apostrophe clearly falls in the latter.

The Catholic faith has a patron saint for just about everything and that goes for diseases that affect the genitals. Back in the day, like way back in the 1300s Saint Vitalis of Assissi had a rather promiscuous lifestyle as he chilled near his hometown in Umbria, Italy. Didn’t we all right? In order to atone for his sins and possibly be rid of that {ahem} itch he made pilgrimages around Europe to various sanctuaries. When he returned he became a Benedictine monk and lived out his days in poverty with his lone possession being an old container he’d use to carry water from a nearby spring.

In some ways this is a lesson in the medical progress of man, Vitalis had to roam a continent and voluntarily become homeless to try and get rid of his genital disease when today you can just head down to the County Health Department. Now all of this genital saintliness is strange enough but this story gets weirder, much weirder.

It turns out that St. Vitalis’ decapitated head ended up in the house of an Irish family where it has been on proud display in the entryway except for when young children visit of course. This is where auctioneer Damien Matthews discovered the skull:

“That’s where I came across it. It is strange and it is macabre but it is very interesting object.”

Matthews owns Matthews Auction Rooms and will be auctioning off the skull of St Vitalis of Assissi along with many other, yet nowhere near as wacky, items on Sunday at the Annsbrook House (seen above), the very place where the skull has greeted many visitors. You can catch a glimpse of the decapitated head of the patron saint of genital diseases before someone gets the itch or burn to buy it via an open house Friday or Saturday.  The price range currently for this piece is in the neighborhood of $1,800.

You know the cast of Jersey Shore is over in Europe right now, as a matter of fact they’re in the home country of Vitalis. What? I’m just sayin’.