VIDEO Triumph the Insult Comic Dog poops on Occupy Wall Street on Conan

Inflatable Triumph the Insult Comic Dog humps the bull statue on Wall Street

Conan O’Brien pulled no stops in his final New York City episode of Conan last night! In addition to officiating a gay wedding (with a surprise appearance by none other than Bravo’s Andy Cohen) and having perhaps the only other funnier ginger than himself, Louis CK, as a guest, he also sent the funniest correspondent in all of television down to Occupy Wall Street to help us understand better what the protests are all about poop on folks!

That’s right, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog made his triumphant return to the small screen with the easiest targets for his sardonic wit since his infamous visit to the premiere of Star Wars: Attack of the Clones back in 2002! (Actually, these might be a lot of the same folks)

I’ll be quiet and let the master do his thing…

I’ve compiled some of my favorite one-liners (sometimes two-liners) with the accompanying photos when necessary:

Triumph kicked things off with the protesters themselves.

“We are out here with a group of people who are protesting our country’s history of allowing corporate greed to go unpunished. And, as you can see from the crowd, many here are also protesting our country’s long history of proper hygiene.”

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog makes a Joy Behar joke at Occupy Wall Street
^ “You know, I wear the same mask when I go down on Joy Behar.”

“What would a protest be without a drum circle, besides bearable?”

Triumph does Occupy Wall Street on Conan
^ “Keep fighting the good fight. I’m sure your parents must be very proud… that your other siblings aren’t here with you”

Triumph insults protesters at Occupy Wall Street on Conan
^ “What happens if the police come in here? It’s going to be a serious bloodbath. Or, even worse for you, a regular bath! (You see, because you’re filthy!)”

^ “This is perfect. He is in a deep, contemplative state. He won’t have any idea that I am pooping on him. He has entered into his own unique J. Crew brand of zen.”

Triumph then moved on to talking with stockbrokers, which was rather difficult at first because none of them were willing to talk. That all changed when Triumph switched identities to… Geraldo Rivera from Fox News!

^ “What is the 99% besides the percentage of your diet dedicated to caramel?”

“I’m kidding. I’m not here to poop all over you, that’s what you pay your Russian hookers to do.”

Triumph suggested to one stockbroker that their problem is that the don’t have their own protest signs, the he provided the man with these suggestions:

“Wi-Fi in limos NOW”
“Lower marina fees”
“Make a Porsche that doesn’t use Pirelli tires”
“My other sign is a yacht”

Then Triumph led the protesters in a few chants, all of which they were happy to repeat fervently:

“Hey ho!
Hi yo!
Stupid chants
have got to go!”

“No justice, no peace!
Chaz Bono is obese!”

“One percent has got to pay!
Lassie was an awesome lay!”

Triumph wrapped things up from a Citibank protest in which he introduced a large inflatable version of himself, which later desecrated the famous Wall Street bull statue. (See top photo)

“They are throwing letters in the form of paper airplanes at CitiBank here. In terms of effectiveness, I would put this rally somewhere in between the Civil Rights March and Team Coco.”

“CitiBank is a great institution… for me to s**t on! I can say that because I’m on TBS!”

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