JEZEBEL – It turns out everything we thought we knew about presidential turkey pardoning was just turkey pardoning lies. Since they’re bred to get huge quick, factory-farmed turkeys grow faster than their bodies can handle and invariably die after a few months of the constant hunger they call life
VOX – In Thanksgiving-adjacent food news, here’s the deal with romaine lettuce, which has always been worth skipping over but is now apparently riddled with E. coli and should be thrown out immediately
THE BLAST – Last night Pusha T did a gig in Toronto for the first time since his beef with Drake blew up. It didn’t go especially well
REALITY TEA – Lest you thought she wasn’t for real Vanderpump Rules star Stassi Schroeder says she knows her fiancé Beau Clark is the one because she would “absolutely snort [his] ashes if he died”
CELEBITCHY – Sarah Michelle Gellar shared a photo of herself in lingerie on Instagram and said she was going to pin similar shots all over her house “as a reminder not to overeat on Thursday”; somewhat predictably, she’s now being acused of fat shaming for the post
THE BLEMISH – Also somewhat predictably, Mommy Blogger Katie Bower is being taken to task for lamenting that her six-year-old son is the least-liked of her five children on social media & that this will cause him to grow up with self-esteem issues. But when you turn your kids into products, can you really be surprised that one of them is the least-popular?
THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP – A bunch of The Challenge‘s cast members didn’t come to CT Tamburello’s wedding after MTV told them they wouldn’t be paid to appear. At least now CT knows who his real friends are
DLISTED – Apparently Brad Pitt would very much like to avoid a trial in his endless custody dispute with Angelina Jolie
LAINEY GOSSIP – The video for Gwen Stefani’s song “You Make It Feel Like Christmas” is now out, a year after she released the song as a single; it’s both pretty feel-good and schmaltzy as hell, much like Gwen and Blake themselves
(Photo credits: Turkey pardoning lies via SplashNews.com)
John Sharp is a Starcasm’s chief editorial correspondent-at-large. Tips: E-mail at john@starcasm.net or send on Twitter at @john_starcasm.
