Jersey Shore couple Jenni “JWoww” Farley and Roger Mathews made headlines in September when it was first revealed that she had filed for divorce after nearly three years of marriage and two children. There were even more headlines in December when JWoww filed a restraining order against Roger after a heated alteration reportedly over her having to go to work the next day. After both incidents, Roger took to social media to insist that he was just trying to be a good husband and father, and also to make accusations about JWoww. Meanwhile, JWoww remained silent aside from a statement from her rep acknowledging there was an incident and a restraining order filed. While Roger has continued his social media campaign to win over public opinion, JWoww has maintained her silence. Until now.
The 32-year-old reality star UNLEASHED on her soon-to-be ex-husband in a lengthy blog post on her website titled “A Message To Roger” in which she eviscerates Roger with accusations of domestic abuse, manipulation, cheating, and more.
“I have spent the last few months trying to protect our children from public humiliation, because as parents, WE ARE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEM,” JWoww begins. “I wanted to handle this out of the spotlight because our silence is THEIR greater good. Even when you tried to disgrace my name, make false accusations and even point blank lie… I still remained silent as challenging as it was … why? Because, greater good. I can no longer sit idly by while you mistreat and malign me in such an egregious manner. You have presented yourself to the public as a praiseworthy father and a husband who has been suffering by my alleged actions and behavior.”
She says that the perception of himself that Roger is attempting to create through his social media posts “are consumed with inaccuracies, false statements, self-serving comments, outright misrepresentations and blatant lies.” She cites a series of recent events involving their son Greyson, including Roger allegedly ignoring their doctor’s advice in regards to Greyson’s food allergies, as well as Roger not letting Greyson’s therapist in the house when she arrived for a scheduled session.
JWoww also claims that Roger recently refused an overnight visit from their daughter Meilani “because it meant spending $20-$40 for a morning babysitter” and “because you’re trying to build a child support case.” And speaking of the child support case, JWoww calls Roger out on his bold statement about not wanting JWoww’s money and signing a prenup agreement, but is now fighting for child support from her.
In a very disturbing turn, JWoww accuses Roger of enlisting two of her previous boyfriends to assist him after she filed the restraining order. One of those exes brutally beat JWoww back in 2007, leading to her hospitalization and his arrest. From JWoww:
It is inconceivable that you personally researched the whereabouts and contacted ex boyfriends of mine to inflict harm upon me after I filed for divorce and you were removed from the home as a result of a temporary restraining order. It is unfathomable to me that because of you proactively contacting an ex-boyfriend of mine to team up against me, he was arrested for trying to extort money from me. You didn’t stop there though. You persisted to try to take me down. You knew that another ex from my college years brutally beat me so badly that I was hospitalized. He was incarcerated for the violent acts against me. He was guilty of 3 counts of criminal contempt in the second degree. He violated an order of protection multiple times. He even contacted me from jail after he was arrested in violation of the order. He showed up to my home, work, gym and it got so frightening that the police department placed a caper alarm in my home for my 24/7 safety.
I confided in you about my painful past as a survivor of domestic violence. How shameful that you used it to beat me down farther. When your own acts of domestic violence against me were questioned, you chose to reach out to this unspeakable person in order to intimidate me. Your attempt to bring this heinous person back into my life (the mother of your children) after he nearly murdered me speak volumes as to who you really are. You are an abuser to the core, Roger Mathews.
JWoww included police reports from the incidents in 2007, including one terrifying attack in her home:
The defendant proceeded to grab [JWoww] by the her hair, at the same time grabbing the complainant’s cell phone from her hand, preventing her from calling the police. The defendant grabbed the complainant by her throat, then proceeded to hit, punch and kick the complainant all over her body, causing the complainant to sustain numerous contusions on her back, right breast, right foot, left leg, and left elbow. All of which caused the complainant to suffer from substantial pain.
The complainant fearing for her safety assured the defendant that she would not call the police on him, at which time the defendant appeared to calm down a bit. The defendant told the complainant he was going to hurt himself if she didn’t get back together with him. The defendant then went into the complainant’s kitchen and retrieved a sharp steak knife out of the draw. The defendant came back into the complainant’s bedroom with the knife in his hand and began slashing his left arm numerous times with the knife, causing his arms to bleed profusely. The complainant was yelling for the defendant to stop but he continued slashing his left arm approx. sixty times, then he proceeded to poke himself in his stomach with the knife. As the complainant was screaming for the defendant to stop, the defendant began slicing his wrist. Then the defendant started crying and the complainant assured him that she wouldn’t call the police, due to fearing that the complainant might kill her, then himself. The defendant wouldn’t allow the complainant to leave her residence and at approx. 0800 hours after sitting in the complainant’s bedroom decided to leave the complainant’s apartment.
JWoww says that Roger being willing to enlist the assistance of these abusers from her past is just further proof of his own abusive ways, before she then calls Roger out for things that he himself has done:
You have spit at me. You have pushed me. You have shoved me. You have aggressively thrown me to the ground. You have prevented me from closing doors to escape having you coming at me. You have belittled and disparaged me. You have threatened me. You have contacted my bosses to attempt to smear my name and hurt my public image. You have called authorities to falsely accuse me of harming our children hoping to get a leg up as leverage in a custody case, only resulting in our children having to be undressed and physically examined, being humiliated and investigated with naturally no substantiation of any abuse on my part. You claim to have suffered? Your actions are reprehensible. No real man would torture his family as you have. You are cruel and vicious. You are a “man” who actually blames the victim. Sadly, I have learned that this is all just ordinary behavior for you. Upon you being removed from the home by the police, I found the records of your multiple arrests, which you previously hid from me. A violent person is who you really are through and through.
As far as the divorce turning into such a difficult nightmare, JWoww once again puts the blame squarely in Roger’s court:
For myself, actions speak louder than words and I can honor that. Yes, even in light of all of the above, and my having filed for divorce, I made sure countless times the kids knew regardless of our divorce, we were still a unit. The day AFTER I filed, I bought Disney on ice tickets for all of us.These tickets were for January. I clearly thought of us co-parenting well into the future as responsible parents should. I invited you and paid for your plane ticket to Greyson’s doctor appointment in Orlando, Florida. Even after 6 months of fighting, every step of the way to get Greyson help you made me feel isolated and alone because you insisted that Greyson didn’t need help and that I was the one who needed it. It was all about safeguarding your ego instead of our son’s medical needs. An obstacle that has been completely frustrating. Yet, I still had Thanksgiving with you to try to remain aligned for the sake of the children. The greater good. Just because two people can’t move forward in their marital relationship, does not mean they can’t co-parent. I have since tried every day to work with you, working with my lawyer to prepare and propose multiple agreements and solutions to resolve all of our custody, parenting time and divorce related issues we have so that we can globally settle the case in record time. Why not be the example of how people can work together for the best interests of their children, right? Unfortunately, you won’t even commit on a permanent basis to me having Mother’s Day with the kids and you having Father’s Day. You won’t commit long term to each of us having equal access to school and medical records for the children. It is inconceivable. Your insistence to fight merely to fight highlights your abusive tendencies. Your spiteful attitude continues to be harmful to this family. You are controlling. You are manipulative. You are irresponsible. Our children are the ones who suffer as a result. Not you.
…I guess I won’t ever know what it’s like “keeping it real… and the real reality.” I am the fool in the end for believing in the hype of you. Nevertheless, I will continue to hold my head up high and be the best parent I can be. I will hope one day you will stop with the hate filled antics and just be a good father to our children, for them… not for the money motives behind it. I will try my best to handle this matter with class and dignity because our children may see this one day. However, make no mistake about it, I will NEVER allow someone to try all avenues to ruin the person I worked so hard to become… I have been broken down, beaten, hospitalized, traumatized, threatened, degraded, battered, and abused. I got out. I stand strong today. For me. For Greyson. For Meilani. They will not grow up watching their mother being a victim of domestic violence. I will be a victim no longer. Roger, know this here and for always – my kindness should never again mistaken for weakness. Remember that.
I will not be threatened.
I will not be controlled.
I will not be broken.
JWoww concludes her blog entry by acknowledging others who are currently in a similarly abusive relationship but are afraid to try to get help. “So many of you may be understandably afraid to come forward, and have been stuck in abusive relationships for far too long just as I have been. If anyone is feeling down, broken, hurt or lost, please know that it is not your fault! Please don’t feel alone. Please seek help… whether it’s through a friend, loved one, hotline, law enforcement agent, judge or stranger … suffering in silence is no way to live. I was there for many years and you and your children deserve to be safe. You are valuable, you are worthy, you are loved.”
Visit JenniFarley.com to read JWoww’s full post, see the court documents from her previous abusive relationships, and watch video clips of Roger.