It’s a bird!
It’s a plane!
No, it’s a bird. Aves Cyrus to be exact – “the rarest creature on Earth” according to the video’s intro:
“Tonight we are proud to unveil our greatest exhibit yet! A creature so rare it was believed to be extinct. Well tonight, we shall see. Ladies and gentlemen, in captivity for the first time, the rarest creature on Earth, Aves Cyrus!”
Pelicannah Montana dons a large pair of wings and some Fergie claws and then tries to do her best Michael Jackshakiritneyguilera impersonation. The whole thing basically amounts to CATS the musical with birds, no plot and lame choreography. The song and the video are exactly what Hannah Montana would imagine a grown up sex symbol pop star would do – and I don’t mean that in a good way.
It’s not “too mature” or any of that silliness, although Miley does do her best to stir the cauldron of controversy by having one of the male dancers grope her breast. I’ve got nothing against women dressed in next to nothing jiggling about, but even near-naked choreographed jiggling can be lame and “Can’t Be Tamed” is pretty lame. It’s so bad Maya Angelou can’t even figure out why this caged bird is singing!
We have lots more of the “mature” Miley to look forward too as her new album, also called Can’t Be Tamed, will be released June 22. (Order yours from Amazon now!)
That being said, here are some photo stills of Toucannah Montana in all her feathery, leathery, “hey big boy let’s get togethery” glory:
Just thought I’d toss a CATS photo in:
Maybe I’m just old, but I think if you’re going to make a video about being wild using a bunch of scaffolding and bizarre costumes then it should look more like this:
For all you literary buffs out there, please know that I did try very hard to work in a Gabriel Garcia Marquez “A Very Young Girl With Enormous Wings” joke. Maybe next time?
