The Seaside Heights police department is staying pretty busy lately with all the Jersey Shore cast member arresting they have to do. The latest MTV reality star to be taken into custody is the otherwise unnoticeable Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, you know the one with a bunch of muscles that is unsure in-love and drops a truck-load of “C” bombs. No not that one, the other the one.
So what did Ronnie do? Did he lay a Jersey beat down on some bar drunk looking for a little camera time? Did he bust a pool cue in half on The Situation’s six-pack? Nope, his crime against humanity was unpaid parking tickets and the blue bloods of Seaside Heights weren’t going to take it anymore! Here is the statement from the SHPD:
“On August 15, 2010 Ronald Ortiz was placed under arrest for outstanding warrants from two separate jurisdictions … Mr. Ortiz was transported to the Seaside Heights Police Department where he was processed and later released after satisfying the conditions of these warrants.”
As we reported earlier when Snooki was arrested in Seaside Heights for drunk and disorderly conduct the mayor of the town, Mr. Ken Hershey, was excited with all the attention his little dot on the map was receiving. Having put two and two together I am calling foul on this arrest! Sometimes us bloggers have to put on our investigative journalists hats and this just so happened to be one of those times. I can see Hershey pacing in his Mayoral office with his chief of staff and publicity team seated around a conference table as he shouts:
“Listen we’ve got to get some more Jersey Shore pub. I don’t care what we have to do but we’ve got to get ourselves an arrest up in here! Anybody got anything?”
A tentative young intern raises her hand:
“Well I think Ronnie has some unpaid parking tickets.” The mayor asks, “Which one is Ronnie?” The intern now has the power of Seaside Heights squarely on her shoulders. “The one with the muscles who drops all the “C” bombs. No not that one the other one.” Hershey is so mad he can barely speak. “Look can’t we do better than the one nobody has heard of and parking tickets? No!?! Can we even arrest someone for that? We can? Well do it, our window of opportunity is closing here folks!”
I suggest the other Jersey Shore stars keep a close watch on their tanning bed bronzed backsides because Hershey’s team is ready for any slip up.
According to TMZ, Ronnie and his muscles have already paid their debt to society, you know the parking tickets and now he’s back home and once again invisible just like the Mayor of Seaside Heights fears his town will soon become. Come on Jersey Shore cast, Seaside Heights needs you to take them to new freaking heights over here.
Top Photo: PacificCoastNews