Hailey Glassman dedication tweet to Jon Gosselin: “F.U.R.B.” (F U Right Back) by Frankee with lyrics

Hailey Glassman Twitter

Hailey Glassman has been keeping the twitter world entertained over the last week and a half with all sorts of blog-worthy tweets including recommending using handicapped people for good parking on Black Friday, revealing Jon Gosselin wasn’t home alone for Thanksgiving but was actually in Colorado Skiing and that she just finished reading the book How To Deal With A Compulsive Liar. (No, that’s not an Al Franken book about Rush Limbaugh.)

Her latest contribution to the Twitter Nation is a heartfelt, loving tribute to her dear lover Jon Gosselin. The actual tweet was:

Aren’t I sweet, I dedicate this song to you.Listen to the words carefully. mwas-lol

Here is the audio, though I should warn you that the lyrics are a bit on the nasty side:

To watch the video on youtube (embedding was disabled) CLICK HERE.

The Song is called “F*** You Right Back” (or “FURB”) and it’s performed by Frankee. Basically the song is a scathing break-up song told from the female perspective letting her significant other know that every time she complimented his sexual prowess (in action or in words) she was faking and lying. Ouch! Here are the complete lyrics with a chocolatey treat substituted every time Frankee refers to the act of sharing her chocolatey treat:

Oh oh
Oooh
No no no

(You know there is two sides to every story)

See I don’t know why you cryin’ like a b*tch
Talkin’ sh*t like a snitch
Why you write a song ’bout me
If you really didn’t care
You wouldn’t wanna share
Tellin’ everybody just how you feel

Fudge what I did was your fault somehow
Fudge the presents, I threw all that sh*t out
Fudge all the cryin’ it didn’t mean jack
Well guess what yo, fudge you right back

Fudge what I did was your fault somehow
Fudge the presents, I threw all that sh*t out
Fudge all the cryin’ it didn’t mean jack
Well guess what yo, fudge you right back

You thought you could really make me moan
I had better sex all alone (ha ha ha ha)
I had to turn to your friend
Now you want me to come back
You must be smokin’ crack
Im goin’ else where and that’s a fact

Fudge all those nights I moaned real loud
Fudge it, I faked it, aren’t you proud
Fudge all those nights you thought you broke my back
Well guess what yo, your sex was wack

Fudge all those nights I moaned real loud
Fudge it, I faked it, aren’t you proud
Fudge all those nights you thought you broke my back
Well guess what yo, your sex was wack

Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea

Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea

Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea

Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea

You questioned did I care
Maybe I would have if you woulda gone down there
Now it’s over
But I do admit I’m glad I didn’t catch your crabs
I can’t sweat that cause I got to go

Fudge what I did was your fault somehow
Fudge the presents, I threw all that sh*t out
Fudge all the cryin’ it didn’t mean jack
Well guess what yo, fudge you right back.

oh oh
uh uh yea
oh oh
uh uh yea
oh oh
uh uh yea
oh oh
uh uh yea

You made me do this

I’m not sure why Hailey would say, “Listen to the words carefully.” It’s not as though there is ANY subtlety here!

Are we to assume Jon has crabs? I thought Kate was the crabby one…

Subscribe to Starcasm by Email