Discovery’s new series Amish Mafia had a hugely successful premiere last week as more than 3.6 million viewers were introduced to “Lebanon” Levi Stoltzfus and his band of Amish Country vigilantes. While researching ol’ Lebanon Corleone’s criminal history (which is 100% booze-related arrests from what I could discern) I ran across his profile on the internet’s version of the horse and buggy, MySpace.
On the site, Lebanon Levi (Real name Levi Stoltzfus) shares a number of photos in which he looks a little less intimidating while going on a tropical cruise to St. Thomas. It seems that people who aren’t living up to Amish standards aren’t the only things this mafia man likes to lean on! He’s also pretty fond of railings:
UPDATE – Levi’s photos have been removed upon his request. They are still viewable via MySpace at these links:
In addition to the photos, which appear to have been taken and uploaded in 2010 (Seriously, someone was still uploading pictures to MySpace in 2010?), Levi also provided a bit of information about himself, one line of which (in bold) I found particularly interesting:
im outgoing love to hang out love friends love to work going on vacation been many places!! i love four wheeling going to my cabin enjoy sports hunnting fire fighting helping others! i love traveling going to the beach concerts or just a nice time at home!! im easy going loving with a warm heart dont like to hurt others or it hurts me. hate to be bored lol!! i love to hang out with friends aswell i love somewhat daring things did a 300 feet bungy jump was exciting!! as me anything i will tell you lol
Who I’d like to meet:
someone who just wants to be friends or someone who wants a relationship!! someone who is active loving and caring someone who loves to travel but dont have to ill stat home lol someone with a loving heart and loves to have fun!!
This sure doesn’t sound like the Amish Tony Soprano to me! There are approximately 140 words there, 12 of which are either “love” or “loving.” Awwwwwww! Forget Tony Soprano, Levi sounds more like Teddy Ruxpin! Normally that’s not a bad thing, but it could really backfire on you if you’re trying to intimidate somebody. “Hey, wait a minute! Aren’t you the guy with that MySpace profile? The one about love this and love that and the only friend you have is MySpace? BAHAHHAHAAHA!” ***door slams***
Here are the rest of the deets from Lebanon Levi Stoltzfus’ MySpace profile:
Here for: Dating, Serious Relationships, Friends
Body type: 6′ 2″ / Average
Ethnicity: White / Caucasian
Religion: Christian – other
Zodiac Sign: Cancer
Education: High school
Companies: [redacted upon request from Levi]
You can catch more of Levi and his crew on Amish Mafia airing Wednesdays at 9/8c on History!