LINKS! Aziz Ansari’s sex assault response, California parents torture 13 kids, Handmaid’s Tale returning…

DLISTEDABC mainstay and Arrested Development debtor Modern Family will most likely end with its 10th season next year. The show’s creators want to go out like Shakespeare and / or Frasier, meaning a birth, a death, or a wedding (or some combination of those things)

REALITY TEAPeggy Sulahian seems to think it’s a lock that both she and Lydia McLaughlin will return for another season of The Real Housewives of Orange County, or she’s just bored and looking for attention

CELEBITCHYAziz Ansari says he’s “surprised and concerned” to hear that the woman accusing him of sexual impropriety didn’t interpret their first and only date the way he did. He also said “I continue to support the movement that is happening in our culture,” which is either courageous or ironic when you remember that the woman accusing him was inspired to do so after seeing him wearing a #TimesUp pin at the Golden Globes

JEZEBELParents in southern California were arrested after one of their emaciated, malnourished, abused children escaped the house where she’d been shackled to a bed and led authorities back to rescue her twelve trapped siblings

THE BLEMISHRegina Simons, who was an extra in the 1994 Steven Seagal movie On Deadly Ground, says Seagal raped her at his house after inviting her to a wrap party where she turned out to be the only guest

VOXTurns out the reason for chocolate’s current rep as a superfood is a whole bunch of scientific studies funded by the chocolate industry going back three decades. Bonus: this explainer is a video. Tell your friends!

VERY SMART BROTHASHere’s a list of important questions and observations you might have missed while being entertained by Grown-ish‘s latest episode — including, but not limited to, “What time is ‘Ho time’?”

LAINEY GOSSIPThe Handmaid’s Tale‘s second season debuts in April, and the first trailer has fans simultaneously overjoyed (because The Handmaid’s Tale!) and super bummed (because it is some heavy duty stuff). So, if you need cheering up after watching the chocolate conspiracy video, you might want to wait on this

UPROXXMany a Star Wars fanboy was enraged when Disney decided to scrap the entire extended universe. If they hadn’t, though, they would have had to explain how Chewbacca died when a moon fell on him (?!). And while it would have been awesome to see how they handled that, maybe getting rid of everything that wasn’t a feature-length motion picture in favor of something simpler was for the best

(Photo credit: Aziz Ansari’s sex assault response via Regina Wagner / Future Image / WENN.com)


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