The Daily Mirror is reporting that pop tart Britney Spears has signed a multiple-book deal worth $14 million. A source for the Mirror says that Britney has been keeping diaries all along, which means we will soon be able to understand what it’s like to experience fame, wealth and motherhood as a perpetually 12-year-old girl from Louisiana. The source goes on to say that Vuh Jay Jayne Austen will write between three and five books over the next decade.
We’d like to offer our assistance to Britney and her publisher by suggesting some titles for her literary diary-uh. In no particular order, our recommendations are: Who Moved My Cheetos, Once Britney Twice Shy, Dummies for Dummies (Dating Kevin Federline), Y’all Things Considered, Snatch-22, Hair Today Gone Tomorrow and Louisiana Karenina. (I will dodge controversy and not mention the Anne Frank-inspired title involving the Papanazis) (Oops, I did it again!)