90 DAY FIANCE Kalani explains Asuelu’s airport dance and why she was upset

On tonight’s episode of 90 Day Fiance, 29-year-old Kalani welcomes her 23-year-old Samoan fiance Asuelu to the United States — but the surprise is on her as a shirtless ‘ula fala wearing Asuelu breaks into an attention-grabbing Samoan dance at the airport, complete with self slapping, hollering, and even a bit of writhing on the floor. Throughout the scene, Kalani’s reactions seem to range from embarrassed and shocked to outright annoyed.

Here is the scene:

If you are curious what dance Asuelu is doing, he stated online that he was doing his Siva Samoa called Fa’ataupati, which is often referred to in English as the “Samoan Slap Dance.” According to Wikipedia, the dance was developed in the 19th century and is the only all-male dance which is almost always performed in groups of more than one. Of course, there are exceptions for fun-loving rebels like Asuelu! From Wikipedia:

The Fa’ataupati is rarely performed alone. This dance requires a lot of coconut oil rubbed on the skin, as the slapping can sometimes leave marks on one’s body. Regardless, it has never stopped the Samoan males having fun, and also having the opportunity to express themselves in a dance that is specifically for them.

After drawing some criticism from fans over the preview featuring Asuelu’s dance, Kalani took to Instagram to explain there was a lot more going on than what you see in the scene that explains her reactions. In the caption for a gallery of brief clips that included Asuelu’s dance and her own facial reactions, Kalani wrote: “That face you make when you know damn well he never fa’aula you nor greeted you with a siva at Faleolo, but nowww he wants to give you the beautiful gift of the LAPD at LAX. ??‍♂️??‍♀️? #imfeelirritation #imfeellikebunchhim”

She explained further in a Facebook post:

Dear friends & family,

I’m sure y’all have seen comments a plenty about Asuela’s airport scene. Just so you know, everything I do this season will be turned into a race thing, because that’s clearly baiting people into watching.

I wanted to quit the show because I was done with the “surprises” and inauthenticity, and I explained this to Asuela the night before he arrived. He didn’t let me know that they set up his dance, so when I realized that I was being “surprised” again AND that he didn’t tell me the night before, I was p!ssed. I was also mad that he never did that for me in Samoa, but did it in front of the camera. That of course is being turned into me not embracing my culture, me being whitewashed, and my dad being racist. ?

If you choose to watch the show, please watch it with the realization that it’s for… [post cuts off]

When Kalani mentions the comments about her dad being racist, that is in reference to a scene from the premiere in which he stated that he didn’t want Kalani dating someone like himself from Samoa. Kalani previously addressed that scene and explains that there was some hocus pocus from producers to make it seem worse than it was:

I’ve been receiving a lot of messages about the scene with my dad, so I’d like to publicly address that. First, the part where I “say” my dad didn’t want us to struggle so he wanted us with white guys—? that is not what was said. Rule of thumb when watching reality TV: if you don’t see it being said, chances are it was spliced together. I don’t care if I get “in trouble” for saying that, that was bullsh*t to be put together in such a way, considering the current racial disparities in the world.

Secondly, after my dad says “my kind of people,” he talks about not liking how he was raised. That’s addressing men born and raised in Samoa, like my dad, not Samoan people as a whole. He says his biggest concern is Asuelu’s age and the way life is in Samoa, once again, referring to men born and raised in Samoa.

My dad can love his country and his people, and still not want certain cultural norms for his daughters. That’s his prerogative as a father and as a man who grew up in a male-dominated country. BUT if you still find yourself so utterly outraged after reading this, please make sure to click the link in my bio and donate to the people suffering from some of the cultural norms my dad was concerned about. ??❤️

Kalani has been very outspoken about how she, Asuelu, and her family are being portrayed this season, which is nothing new for cast members of 90 Day fiance and Before the 90 Days. I just want to point out that Kalani is being extremely calm and very informative with her complaints, unlike some cast members who only wind up looking worse by “whining” about editing, regardless of the merits of their complaints. Being a fan of the show for so long, I kinda saw through some of the manipulations Kalani described, and I TOTALLY get a positive vibe from Kalani, Asuelu and Kalani’s family so far — including her dad.

As a further example of Kalani’s very likable anger over editing and the resulting criticism, here are some interactions from the comments section of the Instagram post featuring Asuelu’s dance:

COMMENTER 1: Well since everyone is being nice and all, I’ll jus be honest, I’m Samoan and I Love my Culture, when u rolled ur eyes when Asuelu started his Siva that was disrespectful to our Samoan Culture, u said ur dad wanted u to date white men and didn’t want u to b with his kind, he worked hard 30 yrs to better his life and he’s from the island, what makes u think Asuelu won’t do the same, Fa’a Samoa is Asuelus life, but I see that ur not feelin it, and might change his Fa’a Samoan ways to ur Palagi ways, because u want a better life for ur son and being part Samoan isn’t it, ur family already doesn’t approve of Asuelu Why?! because he’s Samoan, that’s not his fault, or is this something ur doing jus to make a point, you started dating and now engaged to a Samoan man which your dad very much disapproves of and you got pregnant before marriage which doesn’t look good in the eyes of the Mormons, or I could be wrong, Kalani u can delete or block me but I jus wanted to b honest

KALANI: I don’t care what Mormons think of me—I don’t represent anyone but myself. My dad didn’t want me to get my ass beat—plain and simple. My dad knows that’s what still happens in Samoa and Asuelu knows as well, and that’s why he discusses it on the show too. That was the main issue because it’s still a huge problem in Samoa. It’s a TV show. Everything you see isn’t the truth. If I, or my family, hated Samoa people or the Samoa culture, I wouldn’t have picked the freshest kind. Fa’a Samoa is not putting on a show when cameras are around and not ever doing the same any other time I was in Samoa. Fa’a Samoa is not putting other Samoan people down when you only see MINUTES of someone’s life. You don’t know the backstory, nor do I need to explain it, and you don’t know me or my family, based on a show that’s edited. Have a wonderful day!

COMMENTER 1: I hear what ur saying, but Not all Samoans are like that, I know a lot of things are Edited on reality tv shows, but facial expressions and body languages aren’t edited, I apologize if I offended you or ur family in any way.

KALANI: No offense taken in any way. I know all Samoans are not like that, my dad and Asuelu were only discussing men in Samoa. As for my facial expressions and body language, Asuelu knows why that happened and that’s good enough for me. I hope you can see through all of the nonsense and just enjoy seeing fellow Samoans on TV! Hope you enjoy your Sunday!

COMMENTER 2: Omg! Some people are just too much. It’s a tv show and clearly edited for the ratings. Come on I have heard so many parents talk about their children marrying palagi people in the past and still sometimes in the present because they say it’s for a better life. But hello we are who we are and we choose who to be with. And clearly Kalani has chosen to be with Asuelu. I think I would be the same if my husband shows up to the airport doing a siva ?? my face would be like “what the hell are you doing haha ” not because of being embarrassed for the culture but because of me not expecting it. Sometimes y’all need to stop reading into things so much and stop trying to bring down our people. And get over the fact that the family are worried about him wouldn’t all good caring parents care and want to protect their loved ones and make sure that he isn’t using her for the green card.. I know my dad would 100% be asking all the questions so that he knows his intentions for his daughter are real and not just using to get the green card then gap it. All the best Kalani and Asuelu.

KALANI: ??? THANK YOU! Once we could date he clarified what he meant and that he didn’t care what someone looked like as long as we were treated well and could live a comfortable life. I feel like that’s a normal dad thing, but apparently there are a lot of people in this world that don’t have dads that say/do dad things. ??. Thank you for your comment—wishing you the best day! ❤️❤️❤️

You see Jon, that’s how you respond to criticism without calling someone a c**t or a cockwobbler. 😉

All kidding aside, I REALLY like Kalani and Asuelu! I have a lot of favorite couples this season for different reasons, but Kalani and Asuelu are my number one as far as making me smile and giving me a mutually and genuinely smitten contact buzz.

You can keep up with the rest of Kalani and Asuelu’s journey with new episodes of 90 Day Fiance airing Sunday nights at 8/7c on TLC!

If you are looking for 90 Day Fiance Season 6 spoilers, we’ve got you covered! Click here to find out which couples got married and which ones didn’t!

Asa Hawks is a writer and editor for Starcasm. You can contact Asa via Twitter, Facebook, or email at starcasmtips(at)yahoo.com