Weddings are beautiful celebrations of love and commitment. It’s understandable to organize, splurge on, and even obsess over this special day. Sometimes, however, brides and grooms can lose sight of the experience, and even personal autonomy, of others when they plan their big day. This example takes micromanagement and expectations on the bridal party (& guests) too far.
In a post appearing on the r/ChoosingBeggars subreddit, a bridesmaid shares the demanding text she got from the bride for a December wedding, which was a catalyst for her to drop out.
Demands on Appearance
The bride informs the bridal party that she has hand-picked out their dresses all in a size 8, so they will be expected to be that size by December. “So if you’re not a size 8 I recommend hitting the gym 🤪🤪,” she says.
“No offense to anyone,” the bride explains. “But I have had this planned since I was in diapers and want it perfect.” She’s implying here that she’s had bodily expectations for her bridesmaids since she was a baby, and has chosen not to change her expectations based on maturing into adulthood.
This is the bit that got the OP to drop out, but the bride goes on to make more expectations of the bridal party’s physical appearances. Their nails must be cut short and uncolored, and their hair must be shoulder length and straight. Again she asks them to change their appearance for her, and even spend money doing so: She demands that they get extensions before her big day if their hair is too short. She asks for no fake tans either.
No Kids
Aside from the flower girl, who will only be around long enough to through flowers, kids are banned from this bride’s big day. Her parents will take the flower girl home directly after she fulfills her duties.
“I’m sorry if this seems like a lot of demands but this isn’t[sic] special day and just want it like I always pictured. Plz be respectful and we will have an awesome time.”
Her bestie isn’t part of the bridal party
This Bridezilla’s best friend plans to attend the nuptials as a guest, but will not be a part of the bridal party. She says that they have an “understanding,” and if you “don’t know why just ask.” It’s easy to speculate that perhaps the friend didn’t want to make life-altering decisions to meet her friend’s demands.
$500 honeymoon donation
The icing to this wedding cake is that after this bride-to-be makes extreme demands on what her bridal party should do to their bodies to prepare for her big day she also asks them, and the rest of the guests, to donate $500 for her Hawaiin honeymoon.
“One last thing,” she closes the text. “I’ll be sending my venmo and cash app to the ones who haven’t paid the $500 donation towards Honeymoon in Hawaii 🎉🎉 love you guys can’t wait to be a wifey.”
How did the bride react?
In the comments of the Reddit thread, OP responded to a question about whether or not the bride reacted to her dropping out: “Yes she said she seen [sic] it coming cause I just gave birth last month and didn’t think I would be able to fit my dress but would love for me to come as a guest. Unfortunately I don’t have $500 to splurge on someone else [sic] honeymoon when I never had one myself.”
