Category: Daily Starbuzz

LINKS Countess Luann drinking again, Zoe Kravitz wedding pics, Wilmer engaged…

REALITY TEAWe now have actual confirmation of Countess Luann drinking again, from none other than the woman herself. Luann acknowledged that she’s resumed drinking alcohol (legally), now that she’s made it through probation. When multiple stints in assorted treatment programs are part of your probation, maybe you should reconsider hitting the bottle?

CELEBITCHYLast year, Zoe Kravitz had two wedding ceremonies with her now-husband Karl Glusman — the first in May in the States, and the second in June at Lenny Kravitz’s Paris home. On New Year’s Eve, Zoe finally dropped a bunch of photos from the June wedding (aka the one everyone was waiting for a glimpse of), and they are indeed terrific

DLISTED“Throughout the 2010s, Wilmer [Valderrama], who is 39, parlayed his That 70s Show success into an impressive run of dating some of the biggest barely legal pop stars of the decade.” But all that’s coming to an end, because Wilmer is now officially engaged to 28-year-old model Amanda Pacheco. And he proposed with about six rings’ worth of bling

JEZEBELRudy Giuliani remains employed

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“Cast of TLC’s Hot & Heavy Says the Weight-Themed Show is Not Exploiting Them: ‘I Feel Empowered!'”

THE BLEMISHSurely someone has pointed out this similarity before? Because now that I see it, it looks too obvious to have gone unnoticed for over a decade

THE BLASTA group of elite hackers is going around breaking into celebrities’ Twitter accounts and posting obscene things before vanishing into the electronic night like a Christopher Nolan villain

VOXIf you’ve got a lot of processed food in your diet, here’s why you may want to start eating better

GO FUG YOURSELF“Coming this spring on The CW, Amber Valletta is JUMPSUIT LADY, a crime-fighting, ass-kicking, belt-loving superhero who can pull off that wide-legged cropped number — but only due to her aforementioned super powers.”

LINKS RHOC cast change, Surviving R Kelly II, Pope Francis claps back…

REALITY TEAAccording to Andy Cohen, there’s a big RHOC cast change in the works for Season 15, which will supposedly begin filming soon. Early money is on Vicki Gunvalson, already demoted from main to supporting cast, getting the boot, but for now no one knows anything

JEZEBELTonight, Lifetime airs Surviving R. Kelly II, a look at the legal and cultural fallout stemming from their Surviving R. Kelly documentary in 2019. Among the new members of Kelly’s circle who will appear in the sequel are several of his former employees, who remain firmly suppostive of Kelly and think the women accusing him are all out for fame and fortune

CELEBITCHYAt a New Year’s Eve mass in St. Peter’s Square, Pope Francis smacked a woman’s hands several times when she grabbed him out of nowhere and almost made him fall over. Of course he has since apologized, but after seeing the video I don’t think anyone can blame him for his reaction

VOXAnd speaking of New Year’s Eve and by extension your New Year’s resolutions: Here’s the truth about about the number of calories in your alcoholic beverage of choice. If you need to brace yourself with a drink before reading, go ahead

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPIt sounds like Thomas Ravenel is maybe protesting too much about not coming back to Southern Charm. He swears he’ll never return because his family would “disown” him; I say if he’s even talking about the possibility after the year he had then he has no shame and will absolutely do it given the chance

DLISTEDBusy Philipps took advantage of the New Year to post some choice #AlmostGrams blasting E! for canceling her well-reviewed talk show, Busy Tonight, after just one season a few months ago. Hopefully this is the start of a trend where celebrities talk some serious heat-of-the-moment shit and then wait until the end of the year to share it with the world

GO FUG YOURSELFYes, Lupita Nyong’o is incredible on the February 2020 cover of British Vogue, but I’m still not past the stage where she looks like Adelaide from Us in every photograph

THE BLASTMichael Jackson’s sister Janet Jackson has always kind of looked a little bit like her brother Michael Jackson?

THE BLEMISHAmanda Bynes may have gotten a face tattoo of a thin black heart — outline only — on her left cheek. I think it’s probably just a pen drawing, meant to get a reaction out of people? In any case I hope we can all agree it looks better than Bieber’s

LAINEY GOSSIPOn New Year’s Eve, Michelle Williams and Thomas Kail announced they are a) engaged and b) expecting their first child together, double congrats!

LINKS Dan Spilo speaks out, Kumail Nanjani gets ripped, Meghan McCain vs. Whoopi Goldberg…

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPA couple of days after Dan Spilo became the first Survivor contestant to be removed from the show for inappropriate behavior, he made his first and likely last public comment on the matter. But even the Dan Spilo speaks out news was tainted by controversy, as Spilo only made a public statement after fellow cast member Kellee Kim took Spilo and the producers to task for not listening to her complaints about Spilo’s behavior earlier in the season

THE BLEMISHIf you haven’t seen the Kumail Nanjiani pic yet, do yourself a favor. I don’t particularly care for or dislike his work, but that is a seriously impressive spring break bod. Or some excellent makeup and CGI? Either way — worth a look!

CELEBITCHYBut, Meghan, Daenerys turned out to be badly written and then got stabbed to death after being queen for maybe an hour and a half, are you sure that’s the comparison you want to go with?

VOXOh yeah, and this happened

REALITY TEACome for the RHOC season finale recap; stay for the shade thrown at Gina Kirschenheiter

JEZEBELHeadline Of The Day (bonus points for being funny because it’s true): “Cookie Decorating Parties Are the Ultimate Holiday Scam”

LAINEY GOSSIPIt’s Lost In Translation, right? The answer has to be Lost In Translation

THE BLASTI must be loopy because this story about Shaq insisting Stevie Wonder isn’t actually blind has me *really* hoping that Stevie has just been faking it (or lowkey cataracting it) for the past thirty or so years

GO FUG YOURSELFIt’s one of the most difficult paparazzi genres to cover well: the celebrity-hiding-in-a-car photo gallery. And yet, tell me you wouldn’t appreciate a regular feature based entirely on this: “It is time for us to look at photos of royal and royal-adjacent personages driving to and from Granny’s Christmas Luncheon and make judgements about them based on what they look like through a car window!”

DLISTEDEverything about this clip is goofy as hell, and if it means one is hellbound for laughing at it then count me in

LINKS Oscar nominee Adam Sandler, Taylor Swift rejection, Below Deck drama…

LAINEY GOSSIPApparently we all need to get used to the phrase “Oscar nominee Adam Sandler,” since the release of Sandler (and indie studio A24)’s latest film, Uncut Gems, has only increased buzz about his seemingly inevitable acting nomination. As far as I’m concerned his career peaked when he drew a line in the sand at farting on a snare drum in Airheads (and I mean that with no disrespect)

CELEBITCHYTaylor Swift’s Lady Gaga Oscars moment will have to wait for some other year — “Beautiful Ghosts,” the song she co-wrote with Andrew Lloyd Weber for the Cats adaptation, was not included on the Academy’s shortlist of nominees for Best Song. Salt in the wound: There are fifteen songs on the shortlist, including two from The Lion King and several from movies you’ve likely never heard of

REALITY TEA“Kate Chastain Didn’t Involve Captain Lee Rosbach In Below Deck Drama Because She Didn’t Want People To Think He Gave Her Preferential Treatment”

JEZEBELMy favorite is “Sad Child Man Makes Good Reporter Defenestrate”; what’s yours?

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“Angelina Pivarnick Talks About Her Future on Jersey Shore Family Vacation & the Support She’s Gotten From Show’s Fans Following Mean Bridesmaids’ Speech Scandal”

GO FUG YOURSELFTimothee Chalamet looks a little bit like Saoirse Ronan’s little brother dragged along to a family event in these Little Women British PR photos. (His boots are pretty great, though.) Everyone else looks various shades of fantastic

THE BLEMISHCardi B treated Offset to a night in a strip club for his 28th birthday earlier this week — seems like kind of a risky move for someone who’s been accused of cheating multiple times in the past year and change, but it made for a good Instagram video?

THE BLASTChristina Hendricks is no longer married to the guy who says “I’m freakin’ out, man,” in Super Troopers

DLISTEDTo be fair to Adam Driver, there are few sounds more unpleasant to me than my own voice. So, just like Adam Driver, I definitely would have walked out of an interview with Terry Gross if she had played a clip of me singing anything. However, unlike Adam Driver, I’m not a movie star who has to in one sense talk (and sing) for a living. Deal with it, not-Vader

VOXSubhead of the week, possibly of the year: “Louie was my favorite show of the decade — until it very abruptly wasn’t: The most influential show of the 2010s was ruined by one man’s dick”

LINKS Dan Spilo ejected, Brandi Glanville’s tea, Doubling down on Christmas…

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPHe just became the first person in Survivor‘s long history to get kicked off the show — but why was Dan Spilo ejected in the first place? Rumors are swirling about Spilo’s conduct toward female contestants, for which producers already reprimanded him once this season; the show’s most recent episode revealed only that Spilo had been “removed from the game after a report of another indicent, which happened off-camera and did not involve a player.” I’ll say

REALITY TEABrandi Glanville is talking about the upcoming season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and she’s got some less-than-kind things to say about her co-stars. Namely that she thinks “some other women” stir up drama and talk sh!t simply because “they’re not involved in the fighting.” Also it looks like Brandi is going to out Dorit Kemsley’s phony wealth this season, so, look out

VOXA headline so simple you’ll have a hard time not reading through: “The commercialization of the commercialization of Christmas: Thoughts on ChristmasCon, Hallmark, and the eternal war over Christmas past”

CELEBITCHYApparently there’s a Hollywood A-lister who’s been sending graphic and uncensored photos of himself to swinger couples all over LA. By “uncensored” I mean he’s supposedly not doing anything to hide his famous face (or his soon-to-be-famous dick). There are two good guesses as to the sender’s ID here and I think one of them is definitely more likely than the other

JEZEBELReal Housewives of Atlanta‘s Marlo Hampton on Being a ‘Munty’ and, Yes, a Peacemaker”

LAINEY GOSSIPOne of these release dates will for sure get changed, but, for now, May 21 2021 is for sure Keanu Reeves day since both Matrix 4 and John Wick 4 are scheduled to come out that day

GO FUG YOURSELFMatthew McConaughey really does look like “a truly fashion-forward elf” in this long green coat-slash-semi-dress thing, and it’s working for him (the tinted glasses don’t hurt either)

THE BLASTCome for the headline about Christina and Tarek sticking together for yet another season of Flip or Flop; stay for the completely natural promo pic of these two so far apart you could race go-karts between them

THE BLEMISHWell of course R. Kelly had a sex trainer to teach women how to best have sex with him; that was just assumed, right?

DLISTEDThe first trailer for In The Heights is here, and it’s a doozy. The musical Lin-Manuel Miranda made before Hamilton (and which also won the Tony award for Best Musical) looks every bit a summer spectacular

LINKS Chrissy Teigen’s celebrity secrets, Kanye blue himself, Olivia Wild’s oops…

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPWe got treated to another round of Chrissy Tiegen’s celebrity secrets yesterday, when the always-entertaining model and TV star dished on a number of celebrity-specific behind-the-scenes questions her Twitter followers brought up. My favorite has to be the answer to how celebrities are able to avoid crowds at the airport — not that I didn’t assume they had their own version of everything, I just didn’t understand how *extensive* celebrity airport privacy

CELEBITCHYI’m not going to check social media because I want to assume I’m the first and so far only person to look at these pictures of Kanye West covered head to toe in silver paint for a performance at Art Basel and immediately think of Tobias Fünke covering himself in Lindsay Bluth’s diamond cream on Arrested Development. On that note, Tobias referring to himself as a “standby understudy” for the Blue Man Group remains a wildly underrated joke

JEZEBELOlivia Wilde is trying to defend her new movie’s depiction of a real-life reporter who tries to trade sex for a(nother) tip, something the woman on whom Wilde’s character is based never actually did. The logic Wilde is reaching for is about as helpful as this controversy will be at propping Richard Jewell up at the box office

GO FUG YOURSELFThis is a masterful pairing of an eyebrow-raising headline with a terrific and misleading photo of Tracee Ellis Ross. It only looks like Ross has the titular worst outfit if you don’t click through — and trust me, clicking through is worth it for both the actual worst outfit and the runner-up

THE BLEMISHWhether you’re at a kitchen, a restaurant, a bathroom, or an art gallery, a banana taped to a wall is also an invitation to eat that banana

VOXIt’s hardly the most fun reading in the world, but here is a supremely helpful article about how most sites track their users and keep track of their users’ data, along with of course the what & why of the data sites are keeping track of

REALITY TEA“Scheana Marie’s Boyfriend’s Parents Have Been Vanderpump Rules Viewers, But Not “Fans Of Scheana””

LAINEY GOSSIPAmong the snubs at the upcoming Golden Globes, the nominations for which were announced yesterday: Greta Gerwig’s direction of the upcoming Little Women adaptation; Little Women itself, in the Best Motion Picture categories; and the entirety of When They See Us, Netflix’s massive hit about the Exonerated Five

DLISTEDBrad Pitt would like you to know that tabloids sometimes inflate details or make them up entirely

THE BLASTI can only imagine the jokes this woman has to endure every time her family hosts Thanksgiving

LINKS Cardi B’s hacking story, Trump gets teased, Mena Massoud auditions..

CELEBITCHYCardi B and Offset’s latest drama is a huge and still-growing mess, but the goofiest thing about the Cardi B hacking story is how obviously transparent it is. Cardi would like you to believe that someone hacked Offset’s account specifically to send a DM to one of the women with whom he was allegedly cheating on Cardi last year, because that’s somehow more likely than he got caught and is squirming? “Someone hacked my social media” is to the celebrity world what “I’m retiring to spend more time with my family” is to politics

JEZEBELSo it sure looks like Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, French PM Emmanuel Macron, and British PM and Trump impersonator Boris Johnson were captured on video openly teasing, mocking, and laughing at Donald Trump during this week’s NATO global summit. We can also safely assume this is what happened because after the video came out Trump canceled his remaining public appearances at the summit and got back on Air Force One to come home, both things you definitely do when you did not in fact get mocked and teased at the homecoming dance

LAINEY GOSSIPThere is a huge gap between public awareness of this year’s Aladdin remake, which was a massive worldwide box-office success, and actor Mena Massoud, who played Aladdin in that $1 billion movie. Case in point: Mena just revealed that he’s gotten zero auditions for other roles since Aladdin came out

THE BLASTIn a surprise move, Justin Timberlake acknowledged his hand-holding debacle with upcoming movie co-star Alisha Wainwright, publicly apologizing to Jessica Biel and blaming the whole thing on drinking too much. Justin also denied the worst of the rumors and lamented the example he set for his four-year-old son

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“Corey Simms Speaks Out After Jeremy Calvert & Leah Messer Bash Him & His Wife Miranda During Teen Mom 2 Reunion”

REALITY TEABelow Deck star Tanner Sterback is pushing back hard on rumors he banged co-star Simone Mashile. I’m more amused by the erotic lit names these two are sporting — “Mashile” is clearly French for “Up against the door of a bistro’s walk-in fridge,” and “Sterback” is the delicate act of mixing a cocktail while either getting plowed or plowing

DLISTEDRIP internet-famous cat Lil Bub, whose remains are apparently being sent into space (for charity)

VOXThe first trailer for the new James Bond movie is out. Despite its title, No Time To Die looks like it will definitely be Daniel Craig’s final time playing Bond. It’s a shame that none of his movies in the series have lived up to the promise of Casino Royale; maybe with this one he’ll go out in a blaze of genre-upending glory

GO FUG YOURSELFI actually didn’t realize the third season of Marvelous Mrs. Masel hadn’t already premiered. I’ve written about its stars’ red carpet looks what, ten or twelve times in various links posts? Anyway the third season drops on Friday and once again the cast looks fabulous, if a bit tired of promoting something for at least as long as the thing took to make

THE BLEMISHAnd speaking of time never passing: It’s not that I don’t believe Emily Ratajkowski is under 30 years old; more like it’s hard for me to believe I haven’t been seeing stories about Emily Ratajkowski like these and photos of her like these for at least the past 250 years

LINKS Peloton horror movie, Bieber’s N-bombs, Best charities 2019…

CELEBITCHY The Peloton horror movie commercial lives up to its still-building hype as a terrific bit of scary filmmaking because it a) has a disturbing premise, b) is totally straight-faced about that premise, and c) is very, very short. It also helps that the commercial’s name, “The Gift That Gives Back,” also sounds like the title of a Twilight Zone episode

THE BLASTNow that a few clips of Justin Bieber dropping N-bombs as casually as Kissinger dropping real ones have gone viral, Bieber is trying out the “I want to use my voice to fight racism, not promote it” card. He’s further claiming that the clips were filmed when he was “young,” which is worth several laughs

VOXHere’s how to “save lives” and “do the most good” with your charitable donations this holiday season. (This is also a handy guide for how to best make donations year-round — as with everything else, there is a strategy to charity)

REALITY TEA“Stassi Schroeder & Beau Clark React To Rumors About Scheana Marie’s New Man Brock Davies”

LAINEY GOSSIPI didn’t know that Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbach were a couple and now that I do I can’t stopp giggling at the idea of an indie film power couple. Which isn’t a slight against them, and also Little Women comes out in three weeks so Greta doesn’t really qualify as “indie” anymore? But it’s a delightful image nonetheless

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUP“Just when we think the Duggar Family has exhausted all Rated-G activities to partake in on Counting On, they’re packing up their outdoorsy-skirts and plaid shirts for yet another adventure you couldn’t pay us to go on ourselves.”

GO FUG YOURSELFIs Awkwafina going to get an Oscar nomination for The Farewell? There’s buzz building, she’s terrific in general, and if nothing else we should all hope it happens so she can wear something like this to the ceremony (also, stay for Beanie Feldstein’s dress)

DLISTEDRemember last week, when butthole tanning was all the rage? Josh Brolin is the first celebrity to admit he burned his taint giving it a go

THE BLEMISHCha In-Ha is the third young K-Pop star to be “found dead” over the last seven weeks. There’s no official cause of death yet, but apparently it looks like his may have been a suicide — which would also mean that all three young stars (Cha In-Ha was 27; the others were 28 and 25) killed themselves

JEZEBELAn episode from the new season of The Crown and some royal tea of long standing are behind this Headline of the Week dark horse contender: “Sex, Rumors, and the Queen”

LINKS Dakota Johnson’s Ellen interview, Lizzo nude, Bravo reality crossover…

CELEBITCHYWhen I first saw Dakota Johnson’s Ellen interview trending the other day I didn’t give it much thought. And after watching the interview itself I really didn’t understand the big deal (other than it’s always nice when talk show interviews get weird). But after reading about the rather extensive history Ellen and Dakota share and the recent general backlash against Ellen, I must admit I’m fascinated by this five-minute mini-drama

THE BLASTLizzo dropped another series of nude photos on Instagram and appears to be getting mixed reactions, which seems like part of her point?

REALITY TEAI can only assume that by picking a RHONJ star he’d really “want to work with,” Captain Lee Rosbach of Below Deck really means that a crossover is already in the works

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPTeen Mom 2 Season 9B Episode 29 Recap: Divorce Court & a “Dear John” Text”

JEZEBELIf you’re into fun-ridiculous holiday movies, here’s a review of The Knight Before Christmas to make your heart sing with joy. “The premise is pretty simple, really: A 14th century knight named Cole is zapped to 2019 Ohio so that he can fulfill the special quest that will make him a “true” knight, which in this case is not being roped into yet another ill-advised edition of the Crusades but rather something involving his heart”

GO FUG YOURSELFDon’t be dissuaded by the first of these images; John Boyega does indeed have a strong winter coat game

DLISTEDEven Taylor Swift, one of the many stars of the upcoming peculiarity that is Cats, acknowledges that the whole thing — story, movie, adaptation — is “weirdness”

VOX“The silent ‘sixth’ sense: Propioception is the body’s mysterious ability to locate our limbs, even in darkness. We’re just beginning to understand it”

LAINEY GOSSIPThe speculation about why Angelina Jolie switched talent agencies is plenty juicy whether you’re into gossip about Jolie herself or are interested in some insider-y details about how deals like these usually go down and how agencies can stack the cast of a given project

THE BLEMISH“Taiwanese-Canadian Actor Godfrey Gao, 35, Dies While Filming The Titan Games-Type Reality Show”

LINKS Butthole sunning sensation, Scarlett Johansson doubles down, AGT racism accusations…

JEZEBELIf you’ve got good weather on this Thanksgiving day, you might take the time to go outside, drop trou, and turn your nethers sunward. That’s the advice of butthole sunning sensation Metaphysical Meagan, whose viral post advocating the practice is the thing clogging up your social media feeds this week but that you haven’t dared click on at work

CELEBITCHYScarlett Johansson is still standing by Woody Allen, despite Vanity Fair giving her a chance to revise and extend her earlier defense of him and despite Scarlett’s own acknowledgement that defending Allen is in turn not believing women when they accuse powerful men of sexual assault

DLISTEDIt turns out that Gabrielle Union and Julianne Hough are not returning to America’s Got Talent because of some eyebrow-raising arguments with the show’s producers over its treatment of allegedly racist and sexist comments the women both received and overheard

VOXAnd speaking of Thanksgiving Day acknowledgments (non-butthole sunning sensation category), consider these stories of “4 young Indigenous people on what ‘home’ looks like today: Living away from home doesn’t weaken your ties to the land or to your community”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPTeen Mom 2 Season 9B Episode 28 Recap: Blowies, Birthdays & Broke Baby Daddies”

REALITY TEABelow Deck Star Captain Lee Rosbach Says Simone Mashile Shouldn’t Have Worn Garter Around Drunk Charter Guest; Simone Accuses Him Of Victim Shaming”

LAINEY GOSSIPPeople — both subscribers and not — are still laughing at the technical difficulties that plagued the launch of Disney+ earlier this month, but Disney itself is laughing best. The company’s stock closed “at a record high” on the last day of trading before Thanksgiving, and it remains “the first real challenger to Netflix for streaming dominance”

THE BLEMISHOh, and Disney almost certainly tried to get rid of all the Baby Yoda GIFs earlier this week, for reasons passing understanding but which boil down to “They really are that stupid.” The GIFs are back up now — but for how long…

THE BLASTThe Real Housewives of New York star Tinsley Mortimer has shared the photos of her now-fiancé Scott Kluth proposing to her in Chicago a few days ago. The Water Tower is a beautiful edifice, but as far as romantic Chicago spots go it ranks somewhere between a Soldier Field parking lot and the gorilla house at Brookfield Zoo

GO FUG YOURSELFOne more Thanksgiving-appropriate post for your holiday enjoyment: Here’s a lengthy list of cocktail and mocktail recipes suitable for today’s festivities whether you’re having a grand time or suffering a full-scale shitshow. Happy Thanksgiving!

LINKS Wendy Williams lesbian, Lala Kent on fiancé, Kim K’s thirst…

DLISTEDIf you find yourself reading a lot of Wendy Williams lesbian takes over the next few days, it’s because the woman herself doth protest too much. Wendy took a few minutes on her show to respond to a piece of gossip — and respond quite ardently! — about how she’s now BFFs with Whitney Houston’s former lover to respond that she is not lovers with Whitney Houston’s former lover, something no one was insinuating in the first place

REALITY TEALala Kent is claiming she has “no idea” why her fiancé Randall Emmett is all of a sudden fine with appearing on camera as part of the Vanderpump Rules cast for the upcoming eighth season. Randall himself has said that the reason is perfectly obvious and understandable

CELEBITCHYKim Kardashian may indeed have a “billion-dollar idea” with her Spanx knockoff, but she’s hustling so hard and her people are tossing around the phrase “billion-dollar idea” so fervently that she just looks more and more like the younger sister. Maybe there was some truth to the rumors that Kim is insanely jealous of Kylie’s $600 million makeup line sale earlier this month

JEZEBELSince the Mr. Rogers biopic is coming out there are now a ton of stories coming out about how Mr. Rogers himself was not a saint and should not be canonized. And I agree that no one should be thought of as perfect, but my favorite part of this counter-narrative is his widow Joanne Rogers presenting evidence in the form of “He used to get me to laugh by farting”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPIf you have a spare $795,000 sitting around, you can own the Brown family compound from Alaskan Bush People. And if you’re really imaginative, you’ll find a way to turn it into a West Coast version of Curse of Oak Island and start your own reality TV franchise

THE BLASTHeadline of the week contender: “Botched Doctors Refuse To Amputate This Twerker’s Messed Up Butt”

LAINEY GOSSIPJustim Timberlake maybe cheated on Jessica Biel with Alisha Wainwright over the weekend, and now he and Jessica Biel’s PR people are working overtime to assure the public that those photos of Alisha’s hand on Justin’s leg were the worst part of a momentary lapse in judgment

VOXEvidently The Top Entrepreneurs podcast host Nathan Latka is maybe a secret-in-the-open con man? This would be an even more interesting story if it didn’t involve swindling tech bros, one of the most swindle-worthy of all groups of people

GO FUG YOURSELF“Taylor Swift Leads The Rest of the AMAs Red Carpet: My favorite part about watching the AMAs was the surprising number of crowd shots in which the people were pretending to know the song they were listening to, and visibly bungling the words”

THE BLEMISHNow TI would like us all to believe he was just kidding when he said he accompanies his daughter to the gynecologist and demands to receive status updates on her hymen

LINKS Prince Andrew now just Andrew, Victoria’s Secret canceled, Grace Millane case…

CELEBITCHYWith Prince Andrew now just Andrew thanks to the fallout from his relationship with Jeffrey Epstein and the absolute catastrophe that was his BBC interview, the royal family would like to believe that the worst of this particular scandal has passed. Buckingham Palace is about to be inundated with PR people sending unsolicited résumés

LAINEY GOSSIPIt’s also completely unsurprising that there are now at least two major features on the people responsible for making Andrew’s interview happen and the process behind its production. And even in these pieces Andrew stands out as being almost childishly naïve about how badly the thing went

DLISTEDThe 2019 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show has officially been canceled, and it looks like the show is not likely to come back anytime soon. I had completely forgotten that it usually films right around this time of year, which definitely says something about my shortcomings as a gossip blogger but also speaks to how irrelevant the lingerie parade was becoming

VOX“She was fatally strangled. The media is making it about her sex life: Grace Millane’s story is part of a larger pattern of victim-blaming”

JEZEBELYet another reason to hate leaf blowers and never ever use them: they make yards “too tidy” and contribute to the very literal “insect armageddon” happening across our dying planet right now. (Terrible as that is, the best reason to hate leaf blowers is still that they make the worst sound in the world)

THE BLASTMeet the people where they are, Yeezy: “Kanye West will have plenty of sinners to fill with the power of the lord if he accepts the invitation to bring his Sunday Service to a popular strip club in New York City”

REALITY TEA“Former Real Housewives Of Orange County Star Jeana Keough Wants A Reboot Starring The Original Kids Of Orange County”

THE ASHLEY’S REALITY ROUNDUPJersey Shore star Angelina Pivarnick is apparently not speaking to three of her co-stars-slash-bridesmaids because they roasted her with some good-natured jokes during their speeches at her wedding this week. Isn’t roasting and / or telling embarrassing stories from childhood pretty standard for a wedding toast? I don’t think I’ve ever been to a wedding that didn’t have at least one speech intended to tease the newlyweds

GO FUG YOURSELFWith every red carpet premiere, Clint Eastwood looks more like Jack Skellington’s great-grandfather