I suppose it was just a matter of time. TMZ is reporting that officials from the Miss California organization got their hands on an x-rated video of former Miss California Carrie Prejean and that’s why the dueling lawsuits between the two were dropped like a hot potato yesterday.
Though the tape hasn’t surfaced yet on the internet, TMZ verifies its existence, claiming they obtained a copy of it months ago “but decided not to post it because it was so racy. Let’s just say, Carrie has a promising solo career.”
I plugged that statement into my Innuendonator 3000 which says that the video must be of Carrie playing a game of down there solitaire. (In Carrie’s defense, she could have just been practicing for a new pageant talent routine or, as with her accidental topless photoshoot, maybe the wind was blowing things around and she wasn’t aware the camera guy in her bedroom was filming?) I hope she wasn’t enjoying herself too much because both she and herself are women and if they wanted to make a real commitment it would require leaving California.
Here’s a glimpse of what that wedding ceremony would look like with a little theme music:
Pretty hot! Would Carrie then become the former Mrs. California?
In case you missed it, Carrie Prejean was suing the Miss California organization for religious discrimination, claiming that her views on same-sex marriage led to the removal of her title. Reps for Miss California claimed her termination was due to breach of contract and then counter-sued to retrieve the $5,200 they loaned Carrie to get breast implants for the Miss America competition. (Do they still make “made for network television” movies? This is perfect!)
All that’s in the past now, thanks to Carrie tickling her Elmo for a video camera. As for the settlement, TMZ reports the Miss California pageant will fork over a little cash, but none of it will be going into Prejean’s pockets:
We’ve learned the Pageant will fork over around $100,000 for Carrie’s lawyers and publicists connected with the public battle royale. That money goes directly to her flacks and not into her bank account. We’re told Carrie personally gets zilch.
The Miss California organization issued this statement:
“Carrie Prejean, Keith Lewis, and K2 productions have dropped their claim against each other and wish each other the best in their future endeavors.”
“We are moving forward from the past and looking towards the crowning of two winners and the new look of the upcoming MISS CALIFORNIA USA pageant, telecast live on November 22nd.”
I’m sure Carrie will be OK financially as her new book Still Standing: The Untold Story of My Fight Against Gossip, Hate, and Political Attacks comes out on Monday, November 9. Plus, it’s only a matter of time before the Carrie Prejean Christian CD comes out with guest appearances by Ted Nugent, Kid Rock and Lee Greenwood. Then, it will be 2012 and Prejean will be on the vice-presidential campaign trail with presidential candidate Sarah Palin.
All this nudity and hoo-hoo filly-fallying! It’s a shame! We need more pageant role models like Carrie’s angelic Miss California replacement Tami Farrell! Here’s our favorite beauty queen shopping in Beverly Hills Tuesday:
Mmmmmmmmm… Tamilicious! Are there term limits on beauty queens? Can she run again since she she wasn’t Miss California for a full term? These are important questions that the American public needs answered!