Things between Tamra Judge and her oldest daughter, Sidney Barney, have been strained for years. Back in 2015, the then 15-year-old was placed in custody of her dad, Simon. Since then, Tamra has been on an emotional roller coaster dealing with the fallout of their strained relationship.
On the current season of the Real Housewives of Orange County, Tamra is opening up about the struggles she’s faced– even appearing in a documentary which focuses on families torn apart by divorce.
Tamra says she and Sidney have made strides to mend their broken relationship and remains hopeful they can one day reconcile.
Unfortunately for Tamra, Sidney’s side of the story is very different. In a recent Facebook post, Sidney shares a lengthy explanation of the reasons she and her mom are estranged.
Sidney calls out her mom for being “neglectful” and “toxic” as well as “mentally and emotionally abusive” and claims Tamra lied to her about sharing personal details of their relationship.
— sidney barney (@sidney_barney) August 8, 2017
I want to start by clearing some things up as my mother continues to talk about me despite me requesting her to stop speaking of me publically as I don’t want to be associated with her or the show. For starters, I did not move out when my parents got a divorce nor did I chose my fathers side in the divorce. My parents separated in 2010, I moved out of my mother’s house in 2013. Me leaving has nothing to do with the divorce, it has to do with the living conditions at my mothers house and the way she treated me and still treats me today. In regards to choosing sides, I actually chose my mothers side when my parents separated. This was due to the fact that my mother, the true parent alienator, would constantly talk negatively about my father in front of me and my siblings, putting us kids in the middle of my parents arguments. She even called us Simon or “mini Simon” when we did something bad or told us that we were “acting like your father”. This parent alienation caused me to resent my father and take her side. However as I got older I realized what she was doing along with other things that were toxic.
The reasons I left my mothers house are that she was neglectful (leaving us at home with no food or simply ignoring us entirely), she constantly put herself first and the biggest reason was that she was mentally and emotionally abusive. She was no mother to me. This was an unhealthy environment for all of us kids and unfortunately I was the only one to recognize this and take steps to get out of that toxic environment. I have explained this to her numerous times in court, in therapy, and when we would meet up that the ONLY reason I am not living with her is because she continues to do the things that pushed me out of her house, like talking about me on the show/press/social media, doing embarrassing things on the show, lying to me and putting herself first to name a few.
I went to therapy with my mother for 3 years. I was forced by the courts and my father to try to mend the relationship with my mother. Unfortunately my mother is unable to recognize that she is in the wrong and continues to put blame on everything else. If she would have put the effort into actually working on our relationship, instead of talking and crying about how much she “misses me” on the show and wishes things were different she wouldn’t have missed my entire high school career.
My father has pushed me to have a relationship with my mother forcing me to go meet her in and out of therapy. He even forced me to let her come to my graduation because it was a milestone. When I told my mother that she could come I gave her a few conditions. All I asked was that she remains cordial with my father and my stepmom and to not post anything about my graduation, anywhere. Not even two weeks after I graduated she posted a photo of me and shared it with her one million followers knowing that it would get picked up by the press. The one thing I asked and have been asking for 4 years now has been to not talk about me because I don’t want to be in the spotlight. But Again breaking her promises as per usual, she puts herself, her fame, her reputation, and her bank account before me. If she really wanted a relationship she would keep her promises and recognize that it is no one elses fault but hers that I do not want her in my life.
Although I do not want to be in the public eye, I felt the need to clear these lies up and set the record straight in hopes that it will straighten my mom out so that she is held accountable and is forced to do the right thing. My mom has been portraying the innocent erased mother whose daughter was estranged from her due to divorce and an evil ex husband when in actuality she is the sole reason why I do not want her in my life and will not have a relationship with her. Instead of playing the innocent erased mother character, she could’ve been trying to actually fix our relationship and change her ways. However the character keeps her relevant, and is her only storyline. Why would she actually try to get me back? Without the estrangements she is no longer pitied and talked about and her fame and fortune go down the tubes.
When Tamra was questioned about Sidney’s rant, she responded by saying, “Not surprised. #brainwashed Ask her paid for her very expensive college. I’m good when it works for her and her dad.”
Not surprised. #brainwashed Ask her paid for her very expensive college. I'm good when it works for her and her dad
— Tamra Judge (@TamraBarney) August 8, 2017
If this wasn’t bad enough, former RHOC Housewife Gretchen Rossi chimed in on Sidney’s post saying, “You have no idea how your brave words are helping so many who have been wronged by your mother’s manipulation and lies as well…so thank you for being brave enough to speak the truth. I am so sorry your mother and your family is going through any of this, especially publicly, but continue to stay strong. Your morals and strength are commendable and inspiring.”
Upon seeing the comment, Tamra fired back with her own message for Gretchen.
“I usually don’t give this troll any attention because it’s exactly what she wants. But after years of her bashing me and now reaching out to my daughter I must say. Gretchen you are the biggest piece of shit I’ve ever met. Move on with your sad empty childless life and stay out of mine you thirsty wannabe. You are obsessed with my life and I haven’t even seen or spoke to you in 5 years,” Judge continued. “#MoveOn 👋 You have NO IDEA What my family is going through or what the truth is, Nor do you care. It’s just an opportunity for you to get your name in the press. #obsessedfreak. Funny you of all people should be talking about morals 😂. You have none!”
Since this story was been written, both Sidney’s Facebook post and Tamra’s Instagram post have been removed.
This has become a major case of she said vs. she said. Who do you believe– Tamra or Sidney?
Don’t forget to catch all new episodes of the Real Housewives of Orange County when it airs on Mondays at 9/8c on Bravo.