I was driving home with my dog in the front cab of my truck today when I took a corner a little too sharply. Instinctively, I reached out my right arm and held her back. In that moment, I realized I have turned into my mother — and I don’t even have (human) children yet!
Interestingly, the age at which we have children and the age at which we feel like our mothers don’t always coincide: According to a 2010 poll by Hallmark and a 2013 poll by Dotty Bingo, most women have the “I’m my mother!” realization in their early 30s. However, Baby Center reports the average age American women have their first child is 25.
According to the Hallmark poll, women feel like their mothers when they start repeating momisms and precautionary actions. The top five indicators include worrying more, stocking up on groceries, going to bed early, becoming more outspoken and watching soap operas.
Women also started repeating their mothers’ classic phrases around the age of 31 or 32. Thirty-nine percent admitted to using their mothers’ expressions with their own children — and more than a quarter claimed to use the phrases with their adult partners.
Mia Fontaine, co-author (with her mom) of Come Back: A Mother and Daughter’s Journey Through Hell and Back, believes women are afraid of becoming their mothers, because always hoped to resist the same “obnoxious” habits.
“The things that annoy us, we tend to fixate on more,” Fontaine speculated to Jezebel. “We spend more time thinking about them. And the more we think about something, the deeper the neurological pathway is, and the easier it is to kind of slip into.”
Katherine Rosman, wrote in If You Knew Suzy: A Mother, A Daughter, A Reporter’s Notebook that sometimes being a mom and being tough are often synonymous.
“I NEVER thought I would lose my cool over silly matters (i.e. when my son whines and carries on when I won’t buy him candy at the grocery market). But then there I am in the aisles of A & P, snapping like a pissed-off turtle.”
For all of the bad moments we find ourselves acting like our mothers, there are also good moments. In today’s case, as soon as the thought crossed my mind that I was acting just like my mother, the next thought was just how proud I am for that to be true.
What moments make you think you’re turning into your mother? Does that seem like a good or bad thing?
