PHOTO Time's provocative breast-feeding attachment parenting cover

PHOTO Time’s provocative breast-feeding attachment parenting cover

May, 10, 2012 | AUTHOR: Darren O; | Related : Jamie Lynne Grumet, News

This week’s cover of Time features mom Jamie Lynne Grumet who subscribes to the practices of attachment parenting. The eye-opening image shows Jamie breast-feeding her nearly 4-year-old son. Three additional families who parent via this practice were also photographed for the piece by reporter Kate Pickert.

According to Time:

Attachment parenting has been on the rise over the last two decades, since the publication of The Baby Book by Dr. Bill Sears and his wife, Martha, in 1992. Its three main tenets are extended breast-feeding, co-sleeping and “baby wearing,” in which infants are physically attached to their parents by slings.

For Grumet the method was an easy choice as a mom. She was the daughter of attached parents and her sister practices the method as well. She told Time:

“I grew up this way and never thought about raising my kids differently.”

It turns out Jamie’s son was already a viral YouTube star at the age of 1 in a clip where he sings along to Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face.” The cute video has over a million views and you can check it out here.

To see the additional images from the article you can head over to Time here. Attachment Parenting International focuses on 8 principles that help explain what this parenting philosophy is all about:

Prepare for Pregnancy, Birth, and Parenting

Become emotionally and physically prepared for pregnancy and birth. Research available options for healthcare providers and birthing environments, and become informed about routine newborn care. Continuously educate yourself about developmental stages of childhood, setting realistic expectations and remaining flexible.

Feed with Love and Respect

Breastfeeding is the optimal way to satisfy an infant’s nutritional and emotional needs. “Bottle Nursing” adapts breastfeeding behaviors to bottle-feeding to help initiate a secure attachment. Follow the feeding cues for both infants and children, encouraging them to eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. Offer healthy food choices and model healthy eating behavior.

Respond with Sensitivity

Build the foundation of trust and empathy beginning in infancy. Tune in to what your child is communicating to you, then respond consistently and appropriately. Babies cannot be expected to self-soothe, they need calm, loving, empathetic parents to help them learn to regulate their emotions. Respond sensitively to a child who is hurting or expressing strong emotion, and share in their joy.

Use Nurturing Touch

Touch meets a baby’s needs for physical contact, affection, security, stimulation, and movement. Skin-to-skin contact is especially effective, such as during breastfeeding, bathing, or massage. Carrying or babywearing also meets this need while on the go. Hugs, snuggling, back rubs, massage, and physical play help meet this need in older children.

Ensure Safe Sleep, Physically and Emotionally

Babies and children have needs at night just as they do during the day; from hunger, loneliness, and fear, to feeling too hot or too cold. They rely on parents to soothe them and help them regulate their intense emotions. Sleep training techniques can have detrimental physiological and psychological effects. Safe co-sleeping has benefits to both babies and parents.

Provide Consistent and Loving Care

Babies and young children have an intense need for the physical presence of a consistent, loving, responsive caregiver: ideally a parent. If it becomes necessary, choose an alternate caregiver who has formed a bond with the child and who cares for him in a way that strengthens the attachment relationship. Keep schedules flexible, and minimize stress and fear during short separations.

Practice Positive Discipline

Positive discipline helps a child develop a conscience guided by his own internal discipline and compassion for others. Discipline that is empathetic, loving, and respectful strengthens the connection between parent and child. Rather than reacting to behavior, discover the needs leading to the behavior. Communicate and craft solutions together while keeping everyone’s dignity intact.

Strive for Balance in Personal and Family Life

It is easier to be emotionally responsive when you feel in balance. Create a support network, set realistic goals, put people before things, and don’t be afraid to say “no”. Recognize individual needs within the family and meet them to the greatest extent possible without compromising your physical and emotional health. Be creative, have fun with parenting, and take time to care for yourself.

In a Q&A with Time Jamie explained just how long she was breast-fed by her mother (a long time) and responds to those who find her parenting to be questionable at best. You can check that out here.

To find out more about the growing movement you can get all the info you need via attachmentparenting.org.

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Dianna

that cover is creepy
Pam

I breast-fed my daughter till she was two. She is also developmentally disabled. I would have never breast-fed that long if she had the actual mental compacity of a two year old. I breast-fed the rest of my children(4 total) till they were six months. I’m an advocate for breast-feeding, but this picture is disturbing. If your kid can drink from a cup then he needs to be given a cup.
- Mary
  
  AMEN. If the child is old enough to ask for it and know what is happening, then you need to stop. Its not normal. It just makes it harder to ween them off of it when they get older.
Ally

Most governmental and international organizations advocate exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months & continuation until twelve months, with the introduction of other nutritional foods. Extending breastfeeding in many regions of the world has been linked to, nutritional deficits and failure to thrive in many toddlers and young children. Breastfeeding is best for an infant but the addition of other nutritional sustenance is necessary for a balanced diet for children. Breastfeeding is not nutritionally beneficial for a child that age. He could easily find all the nutrition he needs without breastfeeding. Realistically it’s for the mothers benefit, so she can feel closer to her child. I can promise you I was equally independent minded and confident as a child and i was only breastfed for six months.
Rachel

Does the fact that studies have shown that breastfeeding has absolutely no impact in the long run, meaning you cannot tell the difference between a 20 year old who was breastfeed and one who wasn’t mean anything to these over zealous breast-feeders? What exactly are they trying to accomplish by keeping the kid on the boob until first grade?? When they can explain to me in detail how their child benefits from being breast fed that long than maybe I’ll be more tolerant of it but until then I find it to be unnecessary, disgusting and clearly for the mother’s benefit only.

These sick chicks need husbands that satisfy their need for attention and “bonding”. Can you imagine being the husband of one of these women? He wants to get it on but wifey can’t because she’s gotta breast-feed Junior before he goes out to tee ball practice. Ouch.
- ZoZo
  
  Totally agree Rachel. I have no problem with people breastfeeding, my first son was bottle fed after 3 weeks and I’m pregnant with my 2nd, who I plan to breast feed up until 6 months old. I honestly would not feel comfortable doing it past a year, and think it is really weird doing it past the age of 2, when they obviously do not ‘need’ it. I agree it’s all for the mother, not the child. Which to me means it’s kind of sick, if it’s not for the child’s benefit. To pose for a photo with your almost 4 year old sucking on your boob for the world to see..yea I think it’s sick. I feel really bad for the kid who will no doubt be teased about it. There’s other ways to keep your child healthy, and other ways to ‘bond’ with them.
Jessica

If that’s what she thinks is best for the kid then that’s their business. I just feel sorry for the kid because that image is going to be around for the rest of his life. Hopefully he will be able to live normally, but knowing how cruel people are, I doubt it will happen.
- Tracie
  
  That’s so true. He’ll be known as the kid sucking his moms b00b on TIME magazine. Wow..
jen

I think articles like this is what gives attachment parenting such a negative stigma. Attachment parenting doesn’t tell you to breastfeed your child until they enter school and articles like this only play up that aspect of the philosophy. I wish people would put more emphasis on the aspects such as positive discipline and having a balance in your life as these are key ideas that many people could benefit from. Instead it is always about the crazy co-sleepers and people that breastfeed until their child enters college… More people would be proponents of AP if people stopped making a big deal out of these topics and having people be afraid to be labeled as an attachment parenter due to the negative stigma.
Tabitha

WHO advocates breastfeeding till two years old. Look into stuff before you judge others.
Paige

I breastfed my daughter until she was 13 months, and I stopped because she was becoming TO attached. I needed/wanted her to be more independent, to start trying things on her own, to learn how to trust herself and not rely on me quite so much. While I think that choosing to breastfeed until 2 is fine, I think it really just depends on the child.
Anything after 2 is, in my opinion, not only medically unnecessary but kind of creepy.
Caroline

I couldn’t breastfeed but I think is is wonderful if you can. My husband’s boss’s wife started breastfeeding her 3.5 year old at play group and it was a bit uncomfortable. The child was talking in full sentences and the other kids at the play group didn’t know what to make of it. I think after age 2 it should really be done in private.

My daughter has a classmate who parents used attachment parenting and breastfeed till school started(maybe later?) and though she is a very smart girl, she some behaviors issues. The classmate has a hard time making friends and when she does she is very possesive. She also has to be the teachers pet. It was an odd site to see when this very smart girl came in third place in an academic competetion and at almost 5 feet tall curled up in her mom’s arms while she rocked her to soothe her. I’m not saying I know all the answers of parenting but when methods make your kids stick out so much and others uncomfortable Im not sure they are I would choose them.
BBT

I see nothing wrong with this. The child probably DOES drink from a cup for most things. Breastfeeding past the ‘necessary’ age is simply a comfort for the child and a bonding thing.

There is no room for others to judge what is ‘creepy’ between a mother and child. Children will stop when they want to.

I personally wouldn’t do this, but I don’t stick my nose up at those who do.
Julie

I’m glad my subscription to Time expired.
- Sdw
  
  You are wrong prove it
- DSW
  
  You are a joke prove it
me

I think mothers who want thier child to still have breast milk for a while should pump it. This is ridiculous. On the other hand, I wouldnt mond reading some on Attachment Parenting. I bet I have a lot in common with it. I’m very hands-on, but I’m not b00b out Lol.
Kayla

“The child will stop when it wants to”

See this is the the problem with this type of parenting. The child ends up running the damn house! Since when does a 4 year old get to dictate what it eats and how it eats? Get over yourself ladies, the only people who advocate this behavior are people who want their need for attention met by their child. Wouldn’t surprise me if we examined these womens brains and found that they get more excited when they have a kid hanging off their b00b than they do when they orgasm.
whatever

The picture doesn’t bother me, but it isn’t a very accurate representation of attachment parenting or breastfeeding. This isn’t what it really looks like. The picture looks staged.