Kim Cattrall Confirms “Sex And The City” Movie Sequel

During a British television interview, actress Kim Cattrall confirmed what had been rumored for months: there will be another Sex And The City movie. Spice Girl Melanie Brown was guest hosting The Paul O’Grady Show and asked Cattrall, “Will there be another sequel?” to which Cattrall responded, “Yes there will!” (Click here for the People Magazine article)

Despite likewarm reviews, Sex and the City: The Movie grossed over $400 million worldwide and all but doomed the masculine population to an annual dose of estrogenized 8-year old girls and their obsessions with weddings, shoes, and themselves. A New Line Cinema spokesman confirms the bad news, stating the studio is “in negotiations for a sequel.”

Sex and the City The Movie 2 sequel

****SPOILER ALERT – Starcasm’s resident script psychic has made some predictions about what will happen in the upcoming movie:

Carrie and Mr. Big will break up because Big’s most recent divorce was never legally finalized, nullifying his union with Carrie. They’ll get back together at the end with some gesture involving a name brand pair of shoes. To make it all official, they will marry again in a 100 million dollar ceremony with a unicorn and rainbow theme.

Samantha will poo poo Carrie’s wedding plans, but then unexpectedly start to cry when she actually sees a glittery Carrie in her swan feather wedding dress standing amidst a half dozen life-size unicorn ice sculptures, each spewing a different color of punch. She will have a brief moment when she ponders the possibility that a life full of sex and no commitment isn’t a good life, then she’ll jump some young guy in an elevator.

Miranda will get angry about something and eventually realize she was soooo angry because she was afraid of intimacy, but only after a brief affair with an author played by Tom Selleck. She will stop talking to Charlotte because she wants to wear the green rainbow bridesmaid dress instead of the red.

Charlotte will miraculously get pregnant with triplets, but only after giving the boyfriends and husbands a rare reason to smile with her infinite supply of little black dresses and some sort of minor plot line that requires her to model a bra. She eventually lets Miranda wear the green rainbow bridesmaid dress after the two get drunk and reminisce with 15 minutes of flashback footage featuring all four gals in ridiculous fashion from the ’70s and ’80s.

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